
Virginia Yuna Danieley Lucy

The only thing that matters now are the people we love.
- Dr. Ellie Sattler, Jurassic Park
The Story of a Lifetime
A Foundation in Hope(well)
Virginia was born and raised in Hopewell, Virginia, a fact that she was proud to declare to the utter confusion of her husband, John, who is also from Virginia and has been to Hopewell many, many times. Growing up, Virginia’s two older sisters spoiled her, including with life-changing ice cream sundaes from Serendipity. When she left the family home, they helped her move into dinky apartments with closets so tiny you couldn’t hang clothes straight. As Virginia grew older, she relished spoiling her beloved nieces and nephew as the younger ‘fun aunt’ in the family.
Finding Lifelong Love
From Hopewell, Virginia went straight to Charlottesville to attend the University of Virginia. It was the only college she applied to because UVA was, in her words "the only college I wanted to go to… and I didn't know you should apply to a safety school, okay?" The truth is that Virginia didn't need a safety school because she had a plan and worked tirelessly to accomplish it — a trait she would exhibit again and again throughout her life.
Virginia graduated from UVA with a degree in English. Completely on brand. No surprises there. But it might surprise folks that she considered Archaeology as a major after participating in several archaeological digs. Which, at least in part, explains her unrelenting obsession with Jurassic Park, culminating in a Virginia-penned 'definitive ranking' of the movies. A list that was not debatable. Ever. While she wouldn't admit it outright, Virginia's next step in life was informed by her love of fictionalized legal dramas and specifically the stories 'ripped from the headlines’. (In case there was any doubt, Virginia also penned a definitive ranking of the best fictional female New York ADAs. A list that is, again, not debatable.)
Virginia then traveled North to Carlisle to attend the Pennsylvania State University – Dickinson School of Law, where she consolidated her massive student loans with her future husband, John. Together, they worked in dive bars and dingy restaurants to support themselves through school. Among her many accomplishments, Virginia thwarted a mugging outside one of these fine establishments. Upon hearing a commotion outside, Virginia chased the would-be mugger down a dark narrow alley, growing smaller and smaller into the distance. While sprinting to catch up, it was then and there that John realized he would be running after Virginia for the rest of his life. And he was more than okay with that.
After graduation, and despite being flat broke, Virginia and John set out to see and experience the world together on an adventure that would span more than 20 incredible years. Because Virginia never thought small, the young naïve couple eloped to Paris, which — to be clear — they both knew they couldn't afford, but they were like, "Hey, 'into the breach' or whatever they say, you know?" Even though the decision was financially dubious, they agreed it was one of the best they ever made. That decision was soon eclipsed by the arrival of their progeny, Oliver Lucy. A smaller, but more potent version of Virginia who would go on to share her love of travel, birds, writing, puzzles, and of course watching Jurassic Park while eating candy salads. The sour gummy worms are the best.
A Gift for Being Present
Virginia, perhaps wisely, never followed a traditional legal career path but committed herself instead to the "nonprofit hustle," which translated to drinking enough lukewarm, stale breakroom coffee to power a small city, and mastering the art of the "per my last email" passive-aggressive sign-off. Virginia consistently worked to advocate for those who lacked representation, to acknowledge individuals who were often overlooked, and to ensure that every conference attendee received a laminated resource guide, a bottle of water, and a snack. It was at the National Asian Pacific American Women's Forum (NAPAWF) that Virginia found the organization that embodied the values she championed throughout her career. NAPAWF's commitment to advocacy, empowerment, and inclusivity resonated deeply with Virginia, reflecting the principles she upheld in her professional and personal life. The unwavering support and love from Virginia’s NAPAWF family throughout her health journey was extraordinary, and Virginia’s loved ones are forever thankful.
Closer to home, Virginia was an integral member of the Harrisburg Asian American and Pacific Islander (HAAPI) community. When she attended the very first meet-up, little did she know that the strangers around the table would become her found and chosen family over the next five years. From that meeting forward, she went on to accept leadership roles by joining the HAAPI Vision Team and starting the HAAPI Book Club. At countless events, Virginia earned a reputation for bringing an overabundance of food to potlucks, the gift most coveted at the holiday parties, and for making everyone she met feel seen, held, and valued. Always proud of her Korean American heritage, Virginia forged friendships that transcend generations and lifetimes.
Ever the overachiever, Virginia battled two different types of breast cancer over the course of two bouts. Her care team at the Penn State Medical Center became her champions and cheerleaders, as she was theirs. Regardless of how she was feeling, she greeted each person with kindness and a genuine smile, from doctors and nurses to receptionists, volunteers, therapy animals, and baristas. She learned names, asked after families, eagerly listened to vacation stories, and delivered favorite snacks. While undergoing cancer treatments, she remained an inexhaustible source of empathy and compassion for others. Virginia’s superpower of loving people as individuals was remarkable.
Pursuing Her Passions
Virginia was both interesting and interested. Her curiosity was boundless, whether you were talking about travel, food, writing, books, animals, LEGO kits, politics, health care access for marginalized communities, or really anything. If you were interested in a topic and she didn’t know anything about it, she would lean in and really listen. Her combination of intense curiosity and deep listening made others feel truly seen and heard.
Virginia’s boundless affection for animals — particularly those with missing appendages and regrettable social issues— always endured. In fact, the only recorded time that her husband said ‘no’ was when Virginia wanted to adopt a tortoise but failed to hide the fact that the spry 30-year-old reptile was likely to live another 120 years.
One of Virginia’s longest-running and deepest passions was writing. She journaled almost daily and filled volume upon volume with her musings and lists. Virginia was published in such fine annals as Mochi Magazine and through her own online Substack, A Life Interrupted. As part of her career, she held roles that published content without her byline. From press releases to social media, she was a brilliant behind-the-scenes communicator who crafted the perfect turn of phrase, the knowledgeable comment, or thoughtful insight. She always had multiple creative writing projects going, including a murder mystery (she loved a good whodunit), a middle grade story about a Korean-American child leaning into local activism (a fascinating and timely plot inspired by real events), and so much more. Her love of the written word, both as an author and as an avid reader, is well evident.
She was ‘Good People’
Through all of life's adventures — both the planned and the spontaneous — Virginia's spirit of curiosity and joy for discovery remained at the heart of her family's story. Whether exploring new destinations or simply enjoying a quiet night in with a favorite movie, she inspired those around her to approach life with courage, humor, and an open mind. Her family will cherish these countless memories, each a testament to Virginia's unwavering enthusiasm for making the ordinary extraordinary. She was really, really good people y’all.
"The only thing that matters now are the people we love."
- Dr. Ellie Sattler, Jurassic Park
Musical Tribute
We invite you to share a song that you sang, danced, or listened to with Virginia, or one that simply brings her to mind. Together, these selections will create a collective musical tribute that will play during Virginia’s Celebration of Life.
Virginia's writing and social media
Virginia shared her stories on social media, on blogs, and in magazines.
Gallery
Memories of a Lifetime
If you're not sure where to begin, one of these prompts may be helpful:
* Virginia made people feel...
* Something that was uniquely Virginia...
* Virginia's superpower was...
* For Oliver: Something I want you to know about your mom...
* For John and Oliver: A memory I hope your family keeps forever...
* The world is better because Virginia...
* Virginia's legacy lives on through...
If you would prefer to mail a letter, drawing, note, or picture
Virginia, John, and/or Oliver
care of 1622 Susquehanna St, Harrisburg, PA 17102
Your mom always made us feel at home when we were new to HAAPI, whether it was attending the HAAPI Writer's Club meet for the first time or at the summer picnics or HAAPI meals. Your mother's smile & heart was so bright that her presence was just always glowing because she had you, you Dad and so many friends and loved ones around her. I loved her vegan cupcakes & remembered a conversation where she shared you seem to naturally like eating salads & greens. We had that your greens in mind for the few times we were able to pitch in for the meal train. Another memory she shared was when she recalled you at 9yo saying, "We have money, right?" Your mom answered, "Your dad and I have money because we worked for it. You don't have money." It was funny exchanging stories of raising kids. This is a picture I'm attaching of when we were at the Yi Pin Grand opening and your mom was helping herself to food and we were at the table behind. Wished I got to know your mom more in the time she was around but regardless, her beautiful soul & spirit will be felt as memories of her continue to live in each and every one of our hearts. She was an incredible and amazing woman. It was an honor to know her for the time that we did.

At the time, I was serving as co-chair of the Diversity and Inclusion Professionals of Central Pennsylvania (DIPCPA). During a virtual workshop, I used a clip from Doctor Strange to illustrate the importance of self-awareness—of stepping outside ourselves so we can honestly observe our own lives before trying to change the world around us.
What I didn’t know was that the scene I chose perpetuated yellowface. Someone in the audience recognized that harm.
I only recently learned that someone was Virginia.
As a Black woman whose life’s work is rooted in dignity, belonging, and liberation, I was faced with a choice. I could defend my intentions, or I could receive the truth that my impact had caused harm. Through Ellen, Virginia chose not to shame or condemn me. She called me in. She called me to be better.
That act of courage and grace has stayed with me ever since.
I often share this story when I teach because it reminds people that none of us—even those whose work centers justice and equity—are beyond causing harm. We all have blind spots. Growth begins when someone loves us enough to tell us the truth and we are willing to receive it.
Virginia gave me that gift.
Although I never had the privilege of knowing Virginia personally, her influence has shaped the way I move through the world. Every time I encourage someone to embrace feedback instead of defensiveness, every time I invite others to choose curiosity over certainty, I am carrying forward a lesson that began with her.
I also see her legacy living through Ellen. The grace, courage, and humanity with which Ellen calls people into deeper relationship and accountability now makes even more sense to me. It was nurtured by a remarkable sister-friend.
Virginia, thank you for loving humanity enough to tell the truth with compassion. Thank you for helping me become a better human and a better practitioner. Your legacy lives on—not only through those who knew and loved you, but through the countless people whose lives have been touched because you chose grace over silence.
That is a gift I will carry with me always.
Every single experience with Aunt VV was fun. The way to describe the feeling is like that feeling of being safe, home, and cozy. Really, both Aunt V and Uncle John, who had been the best Uncle in my life. Tears from laughing so hard every single time. OF course, there are a ton more memories, but I'll fast forward to the Turkey Trot in 2019 with Ollie, Uncle John, and Aunt V.V. Aunt V.V. inspired us to push ourselves to be better, healthy, and to love.
I will miss you Aunt V.V. I love you.
I think I might have been in the first handful of folks Virginia called when she first found out her cancer had come back. I was at that point her interim supervisor due to transition in our organization, but also at that point, we were more friends and colleagues than the typical workforce boss and worker dynamic.
Leading up to this -- Virginia and I had been coworkers and counterparts in the communications and policy departments at our organization for over two years. We were bonded by synergistic work (policy cannot go forward without the visibility and vice versa). We were also frankly bonded by tough times at work (what they call "trauma bonded").
And through all the crazy and tough times, Virginia was generally always smiling and easy. She responded to crazy requests with "okay, let's do it this way then." She responded to late night calls with "hey there, what's going on" instead of "wtf are you calling me at this time." She was patient, she was kind, and she was beautiful.
Back to last Fall. We were transitioning to a new all-staff meeting formation where each staff member runs a staff meeting. Of course, Virginia was nominated to kick off this new series because Virginia had the most positive and upbeat personality to lead an all-staff meeting formation. She, of course, readily agreed.
She then direct messages me on that day -- "Small thing, I'm waiting to go to the ER, because I'm having breathing issues. I'll just have to get off the call Right Away when it's done."
I of course write back "Uh... if you can't breathe!!!!!??????... don't run the meeting... go to the hospital now. go take care of yourself. now."
She says with that bright chirpy tone of hers "no no no don't worry!! It'll be fine. I'll run the meeting and I'll go". I was at this point alarmed. I protested a couple times after but SHE INSISTED. Where is the deflated emoji....
I will never forget that. Virginia knew something was wrong but she was going to just push through the day. The day after, she texts me innocuously that they're doing some tests.
Two days later, I'm in a Best Buy parking lot (I will never forget this detail) and Virginia calls. She said, in a voice clearly marred by tears, "Tuyet, It's not good. They found masses in my lungs and it's all over". She and I literally just cried and sobbed, for a while on the phone. Virginia, ever the diligent worker, started talking about transitioning work and I cut her off and said "Stop that talk. Work doesn't matter. family matters. Love matters. Don't think about us anymore." I truly, from the bottom of my heart, meant it. And I think, we were hopefully able to give her that. A release from work. This is due to the leadership at NAPAWF and all of us in management, too.
I'm writing this and crying my heart out at the same time. But I want John and Oliver to know this part of Virginia's life and I want them to know, she always showed up the same way no matter what condition or situation -- radiant and kind and positive.
On the day Virginia passed away, we lost a neighbor too. He was also of the same ilk -- radiant and kind and rarely a single negative word ever crossed his lips. I asked a colleague the next week, "Why are the angels taken so early, why??" She looked at me and said, "Because they are so good, that's why." I totally believe this. Someone so so good may not belong amongst us mere mortals. And that's how I can accept that Virginia was taken away so soon. My heart still hurts so bad when I think too hard about it, but at least the pain is tempered by the fact that she's joined a golden cohort.
I think Virginia would have a good chuckle at how I'm glorifying her, so I'll end with some faded memories.... of how she always had the best bookshelf backdrop on our numerous zoom calls ... of our chats before our check-ins about books that we had read and destroyed us.... of her rolling her eyes at people's shenanigans ... of her delight at Fall things like pumpkin spiced latte and apple cider... of how I complimented her on how hot she looked in her new jumpsuit when she just lost weight and how delighted she was and how she talked about living it up and seizing the moment.... at that same meeting she took the best picture of all of us coworkers, ever.... Virginia, we won't forget you, and your spirit really lives on. Love you.
In her own words, she wrote:
"Four little words that can shatter a lifetime’s worth of plans, hopes, and dreams. When I received the call, I was two weeks shy of starting my dream job, preparing for my son’s kindergarten graduation, and looking forward to warm summer weather.
Cancer was not part of the plan."
Virginia’s voice was a gift, and her ability to turn her personal battle into advocacy continues to inspire. She is deeply missed, but her words and her spirit live on.
Read the full piece at www.mochimag.com/activism/breast-cancer-experience
I'm so grateful that our paths crossed - with you, your mom, and dad. The past few years, I have learned about your mom’s kindness, empathy, strength, fierceness, love, optimism, humor. It was contagious. She welcomed everyone without hesitation.
I know how proud she was of you and how much she loved you.
I see her in you - your smile, kindness, strength and humor. I recall when we took you bowling. While all the other kids spent their tickets on stale candy, you had your eye on a stick-on mustache. I told you that it may not be the best choice for your hard earned tickets, as it appeared to be a bit big for your face. But, you were determined. You won your tickets and once the opportunity arose, you stuck on that mustache and were convinced that no one would recognize you.
I shared the incognito photos with your mom later. She laughed and said," Yup, that is Oliver." That was all you - but this determination and humor also reminded me of your mom. I know it is not easy. Your mom shines through you in all you do. On a side note, I hope you get that tortoise that she (and your dad) wanted for you 💕
With Love Always,
Alice



I saw Virginia again in 2022 at a Haapi event, after my wife, Billie Jo, passed away. Virginia was very kind and seemed to know exactly what I needed back then. She offered her presence and an empathetic ear. She let me talk if I wanted to, and when I didn’t feel like talking, she simply let me know I was around people who cared.
Since then, she always made it a point to check in on me when we saw each other at the Haapi events. The last time we talked, she told me how appreciative she was to have been able to observe my life and how I managed it since the passing of my wife.
I will never forget her kindness during those hard times. I will always remember her fondly and with the greatest of admiration, and love, for how she treated me in my time of need.
Most of the pictures I have of her have already been uploaded to this site, but I did find one that was not (Oct 2023).
James

Throughout the years, she has always encouraged me and been a cheerleader, always rooting for me to succeed. She had one of the most beautiful smiles, the kind that reached her eyes and that you knew was genuine. She was a ray of sunshine that even on dark days would find a way to peak through the clouds. Virginia took full advantage of every single day and was always up for an adventure. She saw the beauty in the ordinary, noticed what others would overlook, and just loved life. And what a life she lived! She found her soulmate in John. I have never witnessed two people that were more made for each other than John and Virginia. My heart hurts for John and Oliver because I know what a hole the absence of V leaves in the universe.
I hope that if you are ever presented with the opportunity to go on that adventure that you take advantage and #LiveLikeVirginia, with no regrets left on the table. No excuses, live your life in the moment, don’t put off what makes you happy, and find beauty in the little things.
To John and Ollie: I love you both and just know I am always here for you and only a phone call away. Ollie, when you get older, I will tell you about some the antics your mom got into when she was younger.
To Virginia: V, I think of you every day. Today, when a ray of sunshine broke through the rainclouds and shined bright for a few seconds, I know that was you saying hi and sending your love.
Always in my heart,
Your big sis, Tammy

One of my favorite memories is our first homemade mandu making session together. It was all pretty chill while we were stuffing and pinching, but when the steamers got going, it was WILD. Sten had multiple steamers going, Virginia was pinching as quickly as she could, I was frying some of the mandu, and you stood in the dining room and said at one point, “I’m just gonna stand here for a bit so I don’t get in the way”. Then we all sat down and started eating, burning our mouths on the mandu, dripping sauce everywhere, laughing, and eating. I’d like to think this is what you inherited when Virginia brought you into the Min Hartman family. It’s loud, chaotic, and overwhelming, but, it’s joyful and “oddly comforting” (your words).
I hold this and so many other memories so dearly. What began as a friendship with Virginia really turned into a really, really big family. We spent time together at Lake Keuka, ate meals around so many different tables, muffled our laughter every time you quietly slipped a joke out into the air, progressed through the McMansions of Harrisburg in our finest, watched our kids play, strummed guitars, took home leftovers from a night with the governor, and more I can’t even name.
Whenever Virginia spoke about you, her eyes completely lit up. You are the love of her life, her most favorite person, and the person she cherishes with her entire heart and soul. Like me and Sten, I learned of how you met in Carlisle and of all the memories (and shenanigans) that took place around Dickinson for the first years of your relationship. It seems fitting that we are going back to Carlisle where it all began. I STILL don’t know how our paths didn’t cross at the Red Devil or GMan, but I’m so grateful that they did so many years later in Harrisburg. It’s hard to imagine a life before you, Virginia, and Oliver.
“When Ellen invites you out, show up.” That’s what Virginia told you and I’m glad you promised to show up. Because I see a very long road ahead of us lined with mandu that needs to be pinched, steamed, fried, and eaten with friends and family.

























I first got to know you through your mother. Virginia would tell me about your quiet strength, big heart, and love of snuggles and quality time. And when I finally met you and your father, we instantly became one big family.
I watched you become a brother to Aida and Elyse. I barely had a chance to ask you about your day before you were swept away by the girls for some adventure into another part the house. However, I always knew you’d come back in the form of Oliver trying to “spy” on the adults and listen to what they are saying. I always knew you were there, but pretended I didn’t know; I wanted you to observe what old people friendships looked like - boring from your eyes now, but so deeply meaningful and important when you look back on these days as a boring old man.
I had soooo many photos to choose from during this beautiful chapter of our lives together. But I narrowed them down to a few of my favorites. I am closing my eyes and remembering each of them with so much joy and happiness: picnics, birthday celebrations, trips to Lake Keuka (when it was snowing and when it was warm enough to jump into the lake), lunches and dinners, pinching mandu for hours (and then eating them in minutes), video games, board games, and so much more.
I know this next chapter may feel scary. I know it does for me. But I keep closing my eyes to tap into all of the love and joy your mother gave us - enough to sustain all of us for the years ahead. There will be so many more meals and memories and moments for us to cherish together, and, when it gets tough and we miss her, we can close our eyes together and call her into the room to help us pinch mandu or jump in the lake with us. We, the Min Hartman crew, love you so much.

















I've been thinking of Virginia a lot, and I wanted to share some of the joyful memories I have about her.
Virginia was a person who took true delight in everyday things. Her daily coffee. A nice pen. Stickers — even though she couldn't ever decide where to stick them. Delicious food. DESSERT! Legos. A journal with great paper. The list goes on.
Being around her, it was impossible not to crack a smile when you heard her raise her hands and exclaim, "Oh, Yay!" over some seemingly little thing that the rest of us might have overlooked. A slice of cake. Sprinkles. A card in the mail. The accomplishment of a friend.
A memory I treasure is the one time I had her come into my house because I had made some food (tacos, if I recall) and I wanted to send it home with her. It had been raining, and when we got outside onto my porch, she stopped dead in her tracks and squealed, "Look at that little snail friend! Be careful not to step on him!" I looked down, and indeed there was a small garden snail trucking along the porch step. (For the record, I did not step on him.) I told her our garden had lots of snails and they like to come out after a rain when the pavement is wet because they can move much faster than over dry ground. So down she squatted, and suddenly a whole village of snails appeared, easily several dozen. We spent the next 20 minutes pointing out snails as we inched our way down the 20 feet of my front walkway. All of this was caught on our doorbell camera, which alerted Aaron on his phone that there was "someone at the front door." He heard our whole silly conversation and witnessed our excited gestures while we pointed out all the snails we saw. Big ones, small ones, some hanging out together.
Did you know that snails have personalities and even best friends? Scientists who study such things have observed that snails, just like people, have preferences about who they like to spend their time with.
Though I'm not a snail, I can say for sure that I LOVED every minute I got to spend with Virginia. Now, every time it rains, I look for little snail friends and smile, thinking about her. Her joy remains in my heart, and I am glad for it.
I love you both and know her joy lives on in the two of you too.
Amy
I’m thinking of some of my favorite stories that your mom told us about you. In these stories I hear so much care and love for you. I feel the values that she and your dad instill in you. You’re such a good person, Oli. Your mom told me once, “Oliver doesn’t have to do anything to make me proud. I’m just proud of who he is.” I hope you keep that with you forever.
"Oliver and I were out at Broad Street Market, for lunch or running errands or something. And someone asked me for money and I shook my head, “Sorry, I don’t have any.” Cause I genuinely didn’t have any cash on me.
And Oliver was so mad at me. “But we can help him mom. You have a credit card. You could find an ATM and give him some money.”
And we had a big conversation about it being okay if we can’t help everybody every time. “Bud, I know. And if I had money I would’ve given it to that person.” But boy was he salty at me for the ride home!"
—
A couple of years before that Virginia made it to a small gathering a little late and quite flustered. We asked her what was up. This is the story that followed.
“I was working from home today and Oliver was home from school. He was mad that I told him he couldn’t do something. Ten minutes later, I’m on a Zoom call with work and I look out the window. Oliver is sitting in the front yard with a handwritten sign asking strangers for help because his mom is terrible to him!
When John got home, I said, “He’s your kid now! Good luck.” And here I am.”
--
In both stories she also talked about the deep, honest conversations she had with you about hard topics. Your mom and dad care so such about you and about raising you to be a caring, generous, joyful human. Keep your spunk and spirit, Oliver.

Family Tree

Celebration of Life
This celebration will be rooted in joy and remembrance. Virginia requested that guests wear festive outfits to her Celebration of Life — so in honor of her vibrant spirit and light, please wear bright colors, sparkles, florals, patterns, or anything that brings you joy.
All family and friends are welcome, including children.
Heavy appetizers will be served.
For those traveling from out of town, Homewood Suites by Hilton Carlisle (20 min walk; .8 miles) and Moreland Garden Inn (10 min walk; .4 miles) are within walking distance of the venue. Additional lodging and travel information is available upon request. Street parking and visitor parking spaces are available all throughout the campus.
Please RSVP by July 3.
We look forward to coming together to celebrate Virginia’s life, share memories, and honor the love she leaves behind.
Holland Union Building
28 N. College Street; Carlisle, PA 17013
2:00 PM to 4:30 PM
Donate
National Asian Pacific American Women’s Forum (NAPAWF), an organization whose mission was deeply meaningful to her and where she dedicated many years of service. Your gift will help continue the work and values she cared about so deeply. Donations can be made at: https://act.napawf.org/a/donate.
Speranza Animal Rescue, an organization she loved and whose mission she wholeheartedly supported. Your gift will help continue the compassionate care and advocacy for animals that meant so much to her. Donations can be made at: www.speranzarescue.org.
Harrisburg Asian American Pacific Islander (HAAPI) became Virginia's found and chosen family in Harrisburg, where her Korean American identity was able to bloom in community with others. Your gift will support HAAPI's mission to foster a safe space for connection, belonging, and joy. Donations can be made at https://www.harrisburgaapi.org.
The American Cancer Society is an organization dedicated to the eradication of cancer through advocacy, research, and patient support. A believer in science, medicine, and equitable access to healthcare, Virginia was a fierce advocate for all patients and their families. Your gift will help continue her fight against cancer. Donations can be made at: www.cancer.org/donate.html.

