Theophilus Nathaniel Butler was loved by all who knew him. Theophilus means "God's Gift" and he really was!
Click the round audio button (left) to hear Theo singing.
Obituary
7 RECORDINGS of Theo
https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1viuviqDeucU1lA5NjqwU6Xr3A6yyFGru?hl=en
Theophilus Nathaniel Butler died at home in Ludington, Michigan on October 15, 2006 at the age of 64. The cause of death was cancer. Affectionately known as Theo, he was born the second oldest of fourteen children in Tampa, Florida on November 27, 1941 to Joseph and Mary Butler. He was a very protective and nurturing brother who showed his siblings the true spirit of giving through his selfless ways. Theo simply adored his mother.
He graduated from Highland Park High School of Highland Park, Michigan in 1959. After obtaining his high school diploma, Theo joined the armed forces. He served his country for two years as a United States Marine and was honourably discharged in 1962.
A year later he married Lorna Lee Mason-Bey of Detroit, Michigan. This union produced two beautiful children, Ferro Kwame, and Faydra Marissa. Theo was a proud, devoted father who loved his children dearly. Theo worked hard to provide the best for his family.
He worked security for fifteen years at Cobo Hall in Detroit. Then in 1978 he moved to Ludington, Michigan and fell in love with its beautiful forests, white sandy beaches and kind-hearted residents. Theo decided that Ludington would be his home for the rest of his life. That is when he began working at Dow Chemical where he developed further friendships that would last a lifetime.
Theo's devotion to his family and friends was only made stronger by his love of God. He was a devout member of the Baha'i community (officially enrolled in 1992). His Baha'i brothers and sisters have been a significant part of his life as he endeavoured to develop his spiritual character. [www.bahai.org]
Theo's hobbies included going jogging and riding his bike. Yet, anyone who knew him knows that his absolute favourite pastime was to watch football.
He leaves behind his two children Ferro and Faydra, his grandchildren Jelani and Marissa, his mother Mary, eleven brothers and sisters, Delores, Kenneth, Lilly, Mirabeau, Ronald, Richard, Gerald, Muslim, Alan, Randy and Joanne, numerous nieces and nephews and an immeasurable host of friends. He will be missed by all. By Faydra Butler (?)
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Nancy Watters' letter to Theo (Written for his memorial gathering)
Dearest Theo,
What a blessing it was to know and love you. I learned so much from you about what is important in life--friends, family, kindness, singing, joy, hospitality, generosity, patience, prayer, gratitude and most of all, love of God.
We often said that we squeezed enough good memories into a few years to last a lifetime. As I think of you now, every memory sparkles, and these beautiful memories are like a bouquet of roses for my spirit. Even the hard times were graced by your steadfast faith in God, and gratitude to Him for all His blessings, which you never ceased to mention. I marveled at your ability to see the bright side of life. Even when it was literally pouring rain, you'd say, "Isn't it a great day!"
You were a ray of sunshine that came into my life during the darkest night, when I was sorrowful and spent. I had prayed "O God, I just need some kindness and gentleness in my life". And within days I met you and you sent me a large pot of yellow chrysanthemums--a hint of the light and love that was to come. Our first conversation was about the love of God, and it went straight to my heart. Our friendship was an answer to prayer and a gift of the angels, but it took me a while to trust that. The first time you invited me over to your house, we sang a couple of songs together and you said, "Don't we make beautiful music together!" I thought it was a corny come-on and said, "Cut the crap!" You laughed lightly, and instead of being angry, were sincerely sympathetic to my obvious woundedness. Later it became our little joke, and you teased me about it, because it was so unusual for me to say something that rude. In fact, we did make beautiful music together. I loved singing with you at the Wilder picnic, at many churches, and at the annual Race Unity Day celebration in Ludington. Remember all those youth dancing and shaking the deck at your Ludington house? We thought the deck was going to collapse. Remember the musical coffee houses there?
I remember watching the sunsets on Lake Michigan and saying prayers together. I remember your generosity to my children. You gave them little gifts when they got good grades. You gave Melissa a silver trumpet. You sympathized with David when he was frustrated at having to live in a house full of women. I remember what fun it was to get the kids out of our hair by announcing that it was time for prayers. They would flee and then we could have some time alone. We laughed so much!
One of my favorite memories is our trip to visit the Baha'i House of Worship in Wilmette, Illinois. It felt like time stood still when we prayed together in the cornerstone room. The floor shook with spiritual energy. Tom Price invited us to sing with the choir that evening. The men had to wear a tie. You laughed and said "Me, a tie???" Folks were so formal and serious, and there were pages of sheet music to sing from. You decided to sit it out appreciatively. It was my cup of tea though, and I was thrilled to sing with them. As we sang in the sanctuary, a storm blew in. Lightening cracked and the lights flickered on and off. The choir just kept on singing. It was a powerful light show—a reminder of God’s might. You loved it!
When you were in the hospital and we realized that you would not be able to walk again, I pondered how life can change so quickly, and I learned from you to be grateful for each day. I learned that we have a choice how we want to react to life's challenges. You chose to be even more patient, kind and uncomplaining than before. You were a magnet of love. People were constantly visiting you because you accepted everyone, welcomed them into your home and your heart without judgment. I still try to be more like you.
I am so grateful that you came into my life, Theo. Our love was one of my greatest blessings. I am dedicating the 'Activating Noble Qualities' project to you because you personified so many virtues. May that work in this world, done in your name, help speed your journey to God. And could you give us a hand from up there too? I know you are winging your way to the Light, and that God's boundless grace is flooding you with joy.
I pray that your family is comforted during their time of great loss. May they all feel your continuing presence, and the presence of the Comforter of all.
With abiding love that connects us always.
Nancy
THEO'S MEMORIAL SERVICE was held at Oak Grove Funeral Home, Saturday, October 21 , 2006, at 1:00 pm
Prayer--Bob Simms
Musical Selection, The Lord's Prayer --Faydra Butler
Prayer--Gary Cools
Musical Selection, On Holy Ground--Thornetta Davis
Obituary--Randall Butler
Eulogy--Gary Cools
Musical Selection--Bob Simms
Toast--Family and friends
Nancy's Tribute
By Nancy Anne Kaasei Watters
'Abdu'l-Baha said ". . . those souls whose inner being is lit by the love of God are even as spreading rays of light, and they shine out like stars of holiness in a pure and crystalline sky. For true love, real love, is the love for God . . . " That was Theo.
As I write this, it’s now been 18 years since Theo passed into the Realms of Light. The memory of him still wraps me in a warm glow. He was a beacon of loving-kindness. Everyone he met was enveloped in his spiritual radiance.
The day I met Theo Butler was the day my life took off in a beautiful new direction. He was a radiant soul, so kind and patient and understanding. He truly was, as his name means, a “Gift of God.” He brought much joy and laughter to everyone. Many people have told me about the healing, heart-warming effect he had on them. If you knew him, I hope you will share some of your memories on this site, so we can all get to know him better.
When I met him, I was a depressed and stressed mother of two pre-teens, working as a social worker in child abuse prevention. I was emotionally exhausted from a hostile divorce that had involved 3 court cases stretching over 4 years. I had finally received the court’s permission to move two states away with my children, in light of being offered a professional job that paid a living wage. My two children were doing their best to adjust to this move, but they clearly were unhappy. This was a big change for us—from suburban Minneapolis to rural West Michigan, population 600 . . . all 12 school grades in one building.
In spite of our beautiful home on Lake Onekama, the stress of parenting and full-time work took its toll on me. Within a short time, my heart had shrunk into a dry, withered knot of pain. Finally, one day, I cried out “Help me God!” I earnestly prayed, “O God, I just need some love and kindness in my life. A few drops of friendliness and caring please?”
Suddenly, a few days later, I had an answer to that prayer and I recalled the Bible’s promise: “Ask and you will receive, and your joy will be complete” (John 16:24).
Out of the blue, a giant yellow chrysanthemum plant was delivered to my office. Such a quick reply to my prayer startled me. And created quite a stir amongst my co-workers too. They chortled, “ Ooo. Got a special friend?” I wanted to know as well. Who was this guy, Theo, who had sent flowers and attached a card with his phone number? I had met him at a Baha’i gathering. He didn’t have my contact information, but he remembered where I worked. Hmmm.
Turns out, this gesture was very characteristic of Theo’s usual generosity and kindness. (One of his earliest recollections was in preschool, where he gave his stickers to a sad little girl who didn’t win any.) As for me, I was still emotionally very bruised and those flowers scared me. Was he some sort of stalker? I’d been through a lot and trust was not one of my strong suits at the time. So initially I was quite nervous and wary.
I left the flowers on my desk for a few days, while I pondered the situation. As I tried to decide what to do, my head and my heart were at war. I enjoyed the sunny yellow flowers. And I had really liked Theo. I had not dated for decades though. It was a scary thought. I writhed in discomfort trying to decide what to do. How did this happen? Someone NICE was courting me? I wanted to run away but my inner voice said, “You should at least call and thank him. That is the polite thing to do. (Oh yes, women must always be polite.) You don’t have to go out with him. Just call and thank him.” I also heard, “Well you did pray for some kindness in your life, right?”) It was a shock to realize that my prayer had been answered so quickly. But it shouldn’t have been a surprise. God had been swift to send help many times. Still, could I trust that this was God’s answer this time? The only way to find out was to call Theo.
So, after a couple days, when I had calmed down, I gathered up my courage and called him. At the end of my workday, I closed my office door, put on my best professional voice, and dialed his number. I obsessively rehearsed what I would say. When his soothing, kind voice answered I thanked him for the flowers. I was so nervous that I don’t recall a word of what we said after that. I do know that our conversation was the beginning of a long, loving, spiritual friendship. Over a period of seven years, his compassion, godliness, and unconditional love healed my heart.
I had met Theo at a gathering in Ludington, Michigan where people had been invited to learn about the Bahá’í Faith. It seemed that the African-American hosts had invited half the town because their house was crammed wall to wall with curious people. When I arrived, I began to circulate, introduce myself, and share Bahá’í ideas, as was my habit. Soon a large, black man, with a kind face and radiant smile attracted my attention. “Have you heard of Bahá’í?” I enquired. This was virtually his first exposure. So, we talked a little. I noticed that he didn’t shy away from talking about God. In fact, he seemed to genuinely love God, like I did. My heart swelled. I felt an unexpected (and longed for) warmth--an electric connection. Our conversation continued, until the program began. Gradually my heart resumed its normal size. I briefly thought, “That man was nice.” Intuitively I felt he had a pure heart. My first take was right. Time showed me that He didn’t have a mean bone in his body.
The Baha’i teachings guided me as I got to know Theo-- “In the estimation of God there is no distinction of color; all are one in the color and beauty of servitude to Him. Color is not important; the heart is all-important. It matters not what the exterior may be if the heart be pure and white within. God does not behold differences of hue and complexion; He looks at the hearts. He whose morals and virtues are praiseworthy is preferred in the presence of God; he who is devoted to the Kingdom is most beloved.”
Our friendship developed through singing together. Bob Simms, a Bahá’í musician living in nearby Scottville, asked us to sing at various Baha’i events. Bob was a folk singer, a special education music teacher and a music producer. He loved to get his students and anyone else he could recruit up on stage. One of the first gigs Theo and I did was a Race Unity picnic at the Ludington bandshell in the park. Next was the annual Bahá’í-sponsored picnic at the Wilder Farm. Recently I found out that many of the places Theo and I sang were places Louis Gregory had spoken decades earlier. Louis was one of the earliest African American Baha’i travel teachers in the US. Baha’i historian Burton Smith has documented Louis’ travels in Michigan, including speaking engagements at Little Blue Lake AME church. When Theo and I sang at the annual Wilder Family Farm picnic, we were unknowingly following Louis’ spiritual trails. He had spoken there February 17, 1942.
Theo was an experienced performer, having been in Motown bands while growing up in Detroit. I, on the other hand, had sung in Presbyterian Church and college choirs. A very different sort of gig. So, this idea of singing as a duo at the picnic was both intriguing and nerve-wracking. There would be no place to hide like in a choir. But I talked myself into it. I reasoned, “It is a very low-key and informal event, with people I know.” Theo and I quickly rehearsed a short off-the-cuff play list: Down by the Riverside, Summertime, and a few Baha’i tunes on peace and unity. My soprano voice blended pleasingly with his velvety, resonant bass. He easily improvised harmonies. CONTINUED ON THE MEMORY WALL BELOW
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Dear God,
Open Thou the way for this awakened soul. . . and enable this bird, trained by Thy hand, to soar in the eternal rose garden. He is afire with longing to draw nigh unto Thee; . . . Thou art the Lord of infinite mercies, Thou art the Giver, the Glorious, the Eternal, the Bounteous; and Thou art the All-Gracious, the All-Merciful. . .‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Bahá’í Prayers, 45-6
. . . perpetuate him existence in Thine exalted rose garden, that he may plunge into the sea of light in the world of mysteries. ‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Bahá’í Prayers, 42
O Lord, . . . robe him in the mantle of Thy grace, bright with the ornaments of the celestial Paradise, and, shelter him beneath the tree of Thy oneness, illumine his face with the lights of Thy mercy and compassion. Cause him to dwell in a blissful abode, . . . Let the angels of Thy loving-kindness descend successively upon him, and shelter him beneath Thy blessed Tree. . . . ‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Bahá’í Prayers, 44
One of my favorite memories with Theo was when were invited to sing at a Black Baptist Church in Muskegon. We stood in front of the congregation and began our performance with a Gospel-style Baha’i song. In traditional style, we started at a slow pace, then gradually picked up the tempo. Suddenly, to my joy and amazement, the whole congregation stood up and erupted into clapping and singing enthusiastically with us. I then realized that this is traditional way of worship in these churches. I had experienced it at Blue Lake AME Community Church, and here it was again. It was so emotionally vibrant and heartfelt. Most audiences I’d grown up with needed a fair bit of coaxing to participate, but these folks joined in at the slightest opportunity. How fun! Not at all like the “frozen chosen” Presbyterians that I grew up with. I laugh now when I recall us singing without even moving our lips! How is that even possible?
Eventually Theo invited me over to his house for a BBQ chicken dinner. This was our first “date”. His brother Randy spent two days making the secret family recipe BBQ sauce. I arrived with my guitar, and while the chicken was on the grill, Theo and I sang a song. At the end, Theo purred with a contented sigh and said, “Well, don’t we make beautiful music together?” It felt like a corny pickup line, a come-on, and that made me very nervous. After what I’d been through, I didn’t trust men at all. I spit out, “Cut the crap”. (This was so unlike my usual polite self.) He laughed good naturedly and mildly observed, “What did you say?” And laughed again. I guess he recognized my woundedness. He was never offended anyone’s prickly moods. He responded with his typical radiant smile and love. He’d had many troubles in his life, and knew what suffering looked like. His 12 younger siblings adored him for his fatherly care and tenderness. Later my bad-mannered words became a private joke between us. He would tease me about my rare incident of rudeness. He’d chuckle and say, “We sang so nicely together, and then you said what?” “Cut the crap”? He’d erupt into laughter. Truthfully, we did make beautiful music together.
When he became ill with cancer, I observed that He never got angry. He never complained. He was so accepting of God’s will. Even when he was in the hospital, he was more concerned with how I was doing than himself. He calmed me. Prayed with me. Teased me and made me laugh. The hospital sent a social worker to see him. Theo reported to me that she was concerned that he was in denial, He was just too calm. That made Theo laugh all the more.
One day, it came time for me to move to Canada to help my daughter with her schooling. It was a tough choice for me. Subsequently, Theo and I lost touch and I grieved greatly. When I found out he was dying I sent him a pot of yellow chrysanthemums, like he had sent me all those years ago. He used to say we should give flowers to people while they are living--not wait until they were dead. So, I did it. His chrysanthemums got there shortly before he died, October 15, 2006, at age 65.
In 2023 I started to wonder how and when Theo had become a Baha’i. Gary Cools told me that he recalls one day when Theo just stood up and said, “Hey, I’m a Baha’i!”. Recently I was able to verify that Theo had registered as a Baha’i with the United States National Spiritual Assembly in 1992.
Linda and Bob Siemaszko were close friends with Theo, and his main Baha’i teachers. So, I called Linda on March 12, 2023, to learn more. I tracked her down in a nursing home. At the start of our conversation her memory was pretty poor due to dementia. But when I mentioned Theo Butler, she lit up like a Christmas tree. She kept repeating what a wonderful man he was. She told me that her husband Bob said Theo was “an angel, a born Baha’i. He had all the qualities in his heart that Baha’u’llah wanted. He just needed to know who Baha’u’llah was.” Bob had a recording studio, where he recorded Theo singing several songs that he’d written, including “Baha’u’llah, I Love You So”. You can listen on Google Drive: https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1viuviqDeucU1lA5NjqwU6Xr3A6yyFGru?hl=en
In that same folder are recordings of three prayers Theo read the day I last visited him. Theo always read prayers to me whenever I visited. Often, I was so exhausted from parenting and working full time, that I would fall asleep on his sofa as he read. He was never offended by this rude guest. He comforted, cheered and calmed me, as he did everyone. And he loved reading Baha'u’llah’s prayers. He would be so happy to know that these recordings are posted here for everyone to enjoy in perpetuity.
by Theo Butler
Oh Lord, bless the homeless
On this cold, frosty, winter's night
When I came home to my
Warm, toasty home tonight.
What a delight!
I sat down at my kitchen table
And started to cry;
Because, by the grace of God,
There go I.
WORLD'S GREATEST DAD, by Ferro K. Butler
I can honestly say I have the world's greatest Dad, who makes me glad even when I'm sad. He said, "I'm glad to be your dad. I enjoy helping you any way I can because I understand what it takes to be a man." When I was a kid he always seemed to come just in the nick of time, with at least a dime or something to eat, or some shoes for my feet. He always took time to listen. That's why I think he is so neat. He always gave me good advice, "Always be nice, but be a man at any price." My dad is the reason why I am the man I am today; standing strong and tall in every way. That is why I give thanks and praise every day for having had the World's Greatest Dad.
ONE WISH by J.B.
Daddy, if I could have one wish, you'd be able to walk again. Every morning you would look out of your kitchen window while the deer feed and the birds and squirrels battle it out in your back yard. You would have a clean bill of health and never get sick again. I wish you were here Daddy. I miss you. My one wish for you is to finally rest in peace. I'll see you on the other side. Love, J.B.
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