Rafael Antonio Hurtado, Jr.

To live in hearts we leave behind is not to die.

From Aunt Jennifer

I never imagined that my beloved nephew would leave us - being robbed of a whole life ahead of him. But life can be so profoundly unfair.

The day I received the call, I experienced such heartbreak and gut-wrenching pain for my sister and her family. I yearned to relieve even just a minuscule amount of their pain. Truth be told, I was actually worried about how much my sister could take. I just wanted the pain to subside, for them all. All I could think of was being present.

When I hugged my sister, the feeling of both compassion and helplessness flooded and overwhelmed me. I knew there was nothing I could say or do to alleviate her grief. Through my sister’s tears, she realized that she would never see what her son would have developed and evolved into, never see him get married and never have the chance to spoil his children. She didn’t know how she would live on, even though she knew she needed to for her husband, daughters and grandson.

Being here today, seeing the anguish on everyone’s faces is beyond agonizing to witness. We are broken. Children are never supposed to die before their parents. The shock of Lil Ralph’s unexpected passing is just impossible for all of us to process.

Lil Ralph’s family understandably won’t want to leave here today without him. Parents never want to leave their children. Our instinct is to be with them and protect them, no matter what.

Ralph was eulogized as a pit master, a great artist, a fur dad to Bear and Fly, a son, a brother, a cousin, an uncle , and a friend with a beautiful smile and a big heart. He will be forever loved and forever missed.

It’s amazing how family relationships are being repaired through this sorrow, but I wish it wouldn’t have taken this. It’s ironic how often through death, that we are reminded how to live. I wonder if my nephew was such a blessing that even in his untimely death, he brought his family together.

May Lil Ralph’s memory be a blessing, and may my sister and her family have the needed support and strength to cope with all the pain and grief that still lies ahead.

The Bible reminds us that there’s a time for everything and that grief isn’t forever. Ecclesiastes 3:1-4: 
“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance,”

There’s never just one “season” in life. Today might be time to mourn, but you won’t mourn forever. Eventually, you’ll heal, and the time to laugh will come again. I just know it. ❤️

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Rafael Hurtado, Jr.

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