Philip Todd Gittens

Phil had no fear and would be friends with anybody! He loved us all and we loved him back. 

Obituary

Philip Todd Gittens—beloved son and brother, devoted uncle, committed friend, bon vivant who never lost his appetite for the commonplace, lifelong learner, and international man of mystery—left this world far too soon, on April 13, 2025.

Born in Riverview Hospital on October 15, 1970, Philip attended St. Leo the Great elementary school and then Christian Brothers Academy before graduating from Holmdel High School in 1988. He was on the wrestling team for CBA and was in the drama club at HHS. He graduated from Rutgers University with a degree in bioenvironmental engineering in 1992 and furthered his education by completing an MBA at California State University–East Bay in 2001.

In 1992 he made a fateful decision that would forever shape the direction of his life. He joined the Peace Corps and set out for Ecuador. There his ostensible responsibilities were to plan and manage construction of water supply projects, but as his friends in the Peace Corps can attest, the job became far more than that. Cultural sensitivity, high-level people management skills, diplomatic finesse, determination, patience, and an aptitude for improvisation were also required. If you didn’t have these, you would need to develop them—quickly! What was also needed at this time of geographic remove from old friends and the familiar world were new friends to carry him through, and in finding that comfort, Phil excelled. “I’ve made friends here that should be for a lifetime. I will never have such a shared experience at any time for so long and so intensely. I can see I’ve changed much in 2 years. My perspective has been altered. It’s been 2 years of experimentation and of living completely by my own rules. I’m quite independent but I realize that I rely much on family and friends and I hope you’ll always be there for me, and I’ll try to do the same.”

And in this, Phil did not just try—he did! Throughout his many years of overseas assignments—in Azerbaijan, Ecuador, Cape Verde, Honduras, Myanmar, Panama, the Philippines, Puerto Rico, and Vietnam—Phil took the time and made every effort to remain in touch with his family and oldest friends, as well as to strengthen ties with the new friends he had gathered along the way. He wrote thoughtful letters and shared candidly before the internet was a thing, and with the rise of email, he carried his computer with him everywhere and continued to connect with others far away even as he shared the present moment with you.

Phil blazed like Halley’s Comet, streaking through our skies periodically as he recounted his adventures for us and recharged himself to begin a new orbit of exploration. Phil’s exuberance for exploring the world was unmatched and he wanted to share his findings with everyone. So, he would periodically send a group email telling of his latest sojourn or set up a slide show in the family living room when he came back “home.” Or he would cook a meal intended to recreate a dish he had had overseas. And, of course, there was always the ideal pairing with a particular wine.

Phil was frugal. He valued experiences over possessions, so he saved on everyday expenses to travel more frequently. He did not travel to places to just tick off an item from a list, but instead, he immersed himself in the history, culture, and rhythms of the countries he went to. He dove deep into Thailand and Vietnam, visiting them for extended periods and studying those languages in addition to his first foreign language, Spanish, and his native English.

His final professional stop was at the Bureau of Reclamation in Yuma, Arizona, where he worked on projects managing the Colorado River water basin. After all the years of international work, Phil embraced this return to the United States and enjoyed the organizational and financial certainties he experienced in these stateside projects. Even more than becoming known as a good engineer, Phil was valued for his well-developed soft skills of building teams and culture and was seen as the freest of free spirits.

Despite his work and these global travels, Phil remained a devoted presence in the lives of his nieces and nephews. To them, he could be both the goofy kid who never grew up, as well as the person who spoke to them as adults and treated them as grownups as they got older. He compiled life lessons and reflections into a treatise for them called “I Can Get Behind That: Guide to Living—Lessons of Uncle.”

Phil is survived by his mother, Joan; his sister Janine Popovich and her husband, John; his brother Jack Gittens and his wife Donna; his brother Colin Gittens and his wife, Maureen Donaghy; and his brother Tom Gittens and his wife Sunny. Phil’s father John passed away in 1990. Additional survivors are Ben (nephew) and wife Raizha Popovich and Casey (niece) and husband Ammar Alawna; Patrick Gittens (nephew) and fiancée Melanie Dombro and Brianna Gittens (niece) and partner Aidan Siegel; and nieces Teagan and Kenzie Gittens.

Phil Through The Ages

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Memories, Stories, and Love

March 11, 2026

A friend of mine and I went to lunch a week after Phil was murdered and afterward we decided to drive by Phil's place. Neither of us had ever been invited to his place, but we knew where he lived. We stopped and went to the apartment; it was in the final stages of being cleaned out. The worker told us that there had been a fight and the "other guy pulled out a knife." We spent a few quiet moments there. I walked through the apartment, took some photos. Very basic, one bedroom, and the dank smell of an aging air conditioner and insecticide. A memorial had been placed near the door, flowers and a half-drunk bottle of beer. As I was leaving, I looked down at the sidewalk - of which the upper layer of concrete had eroded exposing the aggregate beneath - I got the distinct feeling that he was watching us.

On the drive back to the office, my friend remarked that Phil was nothing but a memory now. Perhaps ironically a few days later, from Phil's memorial service I learned that a 17 teen-year old Phil wrote:

"A person who is remembered by anyone truly lives forever because we all die bodily, but our spirit lives on, and one must think of day-to-day-living as ongoing memory for it will become memory as each moment has passed. So, I will accept death if it comes to me, but I want to die if I can with many memories of others and I want to have my impression on them as well. Each person formulates their own meaning of life I suppose, and this seems to be mine at this moment - to experience and learn as much from others and in so allow them to do the same from me."

Our memories and thoughts of Phil do not sustain his continued existence into eternity. His spirit is in God's hands. I have prayed for Phil, as I am sure many others have. That is the only way I found peace inside from the violence of Phil's death and the lack of reconciliation between us. My request was to bring Phil into His sphere in the eternal. My hope is that I will one day see Phil again.

Andrew Scott

April 25, 2025

Leave cairns so we can always follow...

Michael Tjo and Linda Rockmaker

April 25, 2025

Phil was weird, funny, unusual, a crazy character…..all the qualities that attracted me to him when we first met in 1988, freshman year. Through 4 years of college, he was my best friend and my love. He was both intense and mellow, supportive but never suffocating. After college, our lives took on different directions, but he never let distance become an excuse for losing touch. Phil was the initiator, the glue, the driving force that kept us and many of our college friends connected throughout the years. His passion for living and his curiosity of the world is as unquenchable as his compassion for humanity. I miss him, but if I didn’t know him any better, I’m pretty sure Phil is already embaking on his next adventure in the afterlife. Bon Voyage, Phil!!

Anna Kropiewnicki

April 24, 2025

Sharing a few memories of Phil means accepting that he is gone, far too soon, and I write here with much regret and sadness. But I think of Phil nearly every time I season with sumac, a deep red sour and savory spice, including tonight and a few days ago. Each time, I remember how he pointedly praised my seasoned marinade which daringly included sumac, to the crowd around the grill he commanded, back when I was new to all that, without his confidence and skill. He was kind to notice and generous to ensure everyone knew he approved. His generosity continued when he expertly hosted me and once a tag-along friend in San Juan, welcome breaks, while I was in law school in New York City. We had met years ago through a common friend he salsa danced with in the Bay Area. Our friendship outlasted the other. He excelled - as so many have shared - at friendship, and so many other of life’s joys. Phil lived, explored, worked with impressive gusto (and spice), and surely touched more lives than we’ll know. May his memory be for a blessing.

M.J. Williams (aka Jo Williams)

April 22, 2025

I met Phil over 30 years ago when I was a Peace Corps Volunteer in Ecuador. He was a funny, quirky guy with a sharp, insightful wit that cut through the nonsense. I was fortunate to know him over the years as part of our close group of friends that met periodically. He was a a key ingredient of our group chemistry. He also new no boundaries and challenged us to take it to the next level. He will be deeply missed.

Lori Webber

April 21, 2025

What I really admired about him was that he stayed fixed on you and listed intently on what you had to say . . .. a trait that very few people employ . . . He was a cool dude.

Bill Scholl

April 21, 2025

What a shock to hear this news. Phil was one of a kind.,He was dedicated to his friends, family, and his work, yet he always seemed to have a smile and never complain about some of the hard projects he managed. Most of my memories come from when he lived in the Bay Area. He would frequently host dinners and hot tub parties and made everyone feel welcome. I’ll never forget he was my roommate at Jeff Barry’s wedding in Boston and boy that was a night to remember.

Daniel Arendt

April 21, 2025

Phil was a great RPCV friend from our SF Bay Area days. Peace Corps was a foundational experience we enjoyed referring to in our philosophical musings. From hot tubing in the East Bay, to outdoor and culinary adventures, he was usually game for fun. The night where he earned his nick-name 'Donkey Kick' was a memorable one, in Napa Valley at a 30th birthday weekend retreat. Having sampled many of the wines, singing music around the fire, Phil went on a wild 'dance' routine that we all emulated for years . His donkey kick was a hand -stand with legs raised in the air, kicking as many times as possible before falling over. Not for faint of heart or out of shape. But great fun. We had great times and stayed in touch from the 90s onward. I miss you, brother!

Jeff Tweddale

April 21, 2025

You met us here
You met us there
No matter what
You’d meet up anywhere

From Greece and Spain
And Stockholm too
Virginia, Mexico and the
Imperial Dune

You made us laugh here and there
You made us laugh everywhere
You made us eat food that was Swedish Thai
And we almost got kicked out by that bouncer guy

Even when you lived afar
You came and stayed
With us at
The Roanoke Star

You always came when we rang
You always loved the Peace Corps gang
From Sea Ranch, Damascus, Oregon, and Bodega Bay
You were always so much fun and ready to play

From many late night dance parties
And chuchaqui the morning after
Our memories of you
Are chock full of laughter

Our last reunion at Red Rock Canyon
We hiked, we drank, we shared a lot
We looked for you
At the obvious spot

You made us laugh
You made us smile
You loved everyone
That was your style

You left our lives
Way to soon
We will always love you
To the moon

Denise Briggs

April 18, 2025

I met Phil just over two years ago, and he truly was the light of our office. Fridays were especially memorable, as the quiet atmosphere would be brightened by his desire to walk around and catch up on the week’s happenings.

Phil shared stories about his family in New Jersey and friends scattered across the globe. It was clear that they were a source of motivation for him, always fueling his excitement for the next adventure. I will always cherish are our conversations and the unique spark he brought to our office.

Rest in peace, Phil. You will be deeply missed.

David Guerrero

April 18, 2025

Phil was a co-worker of mine whom I helped from day one of his employment with looking for a rental, hanging out at happy hour one evening to getting him ready for field work with his iPad to locate infrastructure locations for his
RO & M Inspections, made maps for him for reports and all in turn to always harass me for working from home and not be in the office all the time like he was.

He will be truly missed and never forgotten. It will be especially hard at Christmas this year as he and I were always the planners of our office holiday party and this year will have to be planned solo. R
I
P
Phil!

Bridget

April 18, 2025

My introduction to Phil was perhaps an unusual one; it was not in person, but over a work teleconference call in February 2022. He accepted a difficult task of re-analyzing a problem that had long since been shelved, and doing so in a short time frame. My first direct interaction beyond just casual was also not in person – over the phone. Don’t recall the details exactly, but I remember that he was there for me when I needed to talk to someone. Over the next couple of years, I got to know Phil a little. We would often meet at one of his favorite spots for a drink or two and some grub. Last I saw Phil, he was in very good spirits, having had a nice morning bike ride and a “power” day at the office. He loved life and was often satisfied with simple things. That is something many of us can learn from – do the best you can but enjoy what you are doing, whatever it is.

Andrew Scott

April 17, 2025

I've often thought about how to describe Phil and always ended up thinking I would need a dictionary to help me.
If anyone could rock a neon yellow shirt from Thailand, a "found" red, white and blue cowboy hat, mirror reflective sunglasses and sandals, it was Phil.
It anyone could whip up a delicious meal from strange and curious ingredients that you weren't sure was safe to eat, it was Phil.
If anyone could be so fun and adventurous as to agree to meet you in Thebes, Greece without telling them where you were staying it was Phil.
If anyone could watch a movie one scene at a time, it was Phil. If anyone could appreciate great wine while dancing to music you've never heard of it was Phil.
If anyone thought that they could be a friend with anyone else it was Phil.
If anyone would do anything for a friend it was Phil.
Now I realize I didn't need a dictionary at all. The best word to describe Phil was right in front of me all along. It was the first word in his email address:
unforgettable

Chip Briggs

April 16, 2025

It’s hard to put into words the depth of loss I feel at the passing of my friend. We first met over 30 years ago during our Peace Corps service in Ecuador, where I had the privilege of being his wingman on several life-changing water projects. He was my nearest Peace Corps neighbor and we spent a lot of time together. That time cemented a bond of friendship that lasted a lifetime. His passion for the world and his adventurous spirit never wavered and in fact only seemed to grow over the years. Whether in remote corners of the globe or gathered around a table having a meal with friends, he brought energy, laughter, and an “unforgettable Phil” spark that made life feel richer.

He was one of the most unique people I’ve ever known—incredibly intelligent, endlessly curious, and always, always up for a good time.

I’m going to miss you Felipe.

Dean DeSantis

April 16, 2025

I'll have more to say when I can gather my thoughts. Like all of you, I am shocked and struggling to find the words. To say that a bright light has gone out in the world is an understatement. Phil's light was kaleidoscopic. There's a Phil shaped hole in my heart that surely nothing else could ever quite fill...

Andrew Powers

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