Post your condolences or share your Memories.
I am so sad to read this, I cannot believe it. I did a 5 day trauma workshop with Mark via the Link Centre, hence I found out this news, as I was looking on the Link Centre website for more workshops from Mark. He really inspired me as a counsellor and I really have taken his energy with me into my work. He inspired me to be myself, bring humour, be human, don't have to be perfect, but aim high and give clients a brilliant experience. I thought he was wonderful. I have told so many people about my experience on the course as it was so impactful, and I found his work so incredible.
Amy Smith
I'll never have the right words to describe what Mark meant to me, and the impact that he had on my life the 5 years I knew him - that's what's stopped me from making a post here until now.
But now, the night before the start of my TA training, I'm finding myself revisiting this page, and it feels right to say something.
This is a journey that Mark set me on, and while it feels so unfair that he's not here to see it continue, I'll always carry him with me wherever it takes me.
I notice bits of him in the way I am with clients, turns of phrase and little mannerisms I've picked up, and my Nurturing Parent has his voice.
He showed me that there was a future for people like us, and then he told me to go out there and get it.
One of the last things he ever said to me was "I'm really proud of you. You deserve to do well."
Mark pushed me, and I flew.
Abel
“And when your sorrow is comforted” (time soothes all sorrows) you will be content that you have known me.
Antoine de Saint - Exupery
The Little Prince
I met Mark briefly during my studies at Salford University. His lectures were energising and engaging. Such sad news sending love and strength to his loved ones and friends.
Carla Moore
Carla Moore
“Come to the edge," he said.
"We can't, we're afraid!" they responded.
"Come to the edge," he said.
"We can't, We will fall!" they responded.
"Come to the edge," he said.
And so they came.
And he pushed them.
And they flew.
- Guillaume Apollinaire
I remember Mark sharing this in one of our lectures, commenting that it’s what he would want on his headstone. It touched me then, and especially now. I feel it encapsulates the unwavering support for others and belief Mark had in the resiliency of the human spirit. I’m so devastated to learn of his loss, and months after his passing, too. I wish I’d had a chance to say goodbye. Thank you for inspiring me so greatly, and affirming my decision to be a therapist in each lecture I had with you. I had hoped to train with Mark in the future, and feel robbed of the opportunity to continue learning from such an incredible person. I’m so grateful to have been able to learn from Mark at all.
Sending so much love to his husband and family. I’m so deeply sorry for your loss.
Olivia Kennah
I cannot believe that Mark is away. The energy Mark had lit up a room and the stories he told made his lectures enjoyable. Mark never held back, was refreshingly honest and funny at times. Mark wore his heart on his sleeve and his strength always amazed me after hearing some of the cards he had been dealt in life. I hope now Mark you are at peace. You will always be fondly remembered.
Naomi Welsh
Mark was not only my lecturer at university but also someone I continued to train with at The Link Centre. Mark was a kind and caring spirit, a person who passionately represented marginalised groups and stood as a voice for the working class. For me, studying with him was an incredible privilege—one that made me feel welcomed and deserving. It was an experience I had never found in my previous academic history, and it’s something I will always cherish deeply.
Mark was unapologetically himself—a no-nonsense, brave, and bolshy character who was always the most entertaining. 🌟 His presence lit up any room, and his energy was contagious. I will dearly miss his self-care tips, which included enjoying gin on Friday nights, endless cups of tea and cake served by Philip, and soaking up the Manchester City vibes. 🕺😂
His presence, energy, and dedication to the field of psychotherapy created a huge impact, and his absence will be deeply felt by many. He leaves behind a gap that will be incredibly hard to fill. I feel so grateful to have had the opportunity to learn from and train with him before he was taken away far too soon.
Rest in peace, Mark. You will be greatly missed, but your legacy will live on through all those you have inspired. 😢
Kay Appleton
Inconcieveable that such an irreverent sparkle of a man and all his magic could be snuffed out in the middle of his holiday to Portugal, I don't believe it, not possible. Mark was a profoundly compassionate, bright and zesty, deeply sincere force for good.
When we started couple's therapy with him he scooped us up and transformed our relationship. He held a space and fought with us, performing many small miracles along the way and so much of our present happiness is owed to him. Our interactions were peppered with playful anecdotes giving us beautiful glimpses into his personal life, the reoccurring theme always being how much he adored his husband Philip. He was always fidgeting, always engaged, always reaching out to us, trying to pull something good out of us and he always managed. What a gift. We were blessed to be in such close proximity to him if only for a handful of moments.
Alice (in Wonderland) asks the White Rabbit, "How long is forever?", he replies, "Sometimes just one second." Our hearts go out to Philip, and all the family. We will treasure our little forever with Mark, forever.
Emily & Brandon
My colleagues and I have learned a lot from this unique and irreplaceable man. Our clients especially benefited after reading each of his books or attending his workshops.
We remember January 2016, when he visited Serbia for the first time (now I know it was also the last time), leaving an indelible mark on the TA community in our country.
Uros Rajakovic
I had the pleasure of having Mark as one of my lecturers on the counselling course. I'd always look forward to my day if I saw that Mark was taking the lecture and would sit right at the front so I could get involved. He made me laugh so many times and I felt so at home in his company. I always found it so funny how 'sweary' he was and I'd walk out of every lecture with a beaming smile. What an endearing, empathetic, kind, generous, beautiful soul. I was heartbroken and so shocked to hear of Mark's passing. I send all my love to Mark's husband, his family and friends. I consider myself very lucky to have crossed paths with Mark. <3 xxxx
Natasha Brierley
I have known Mark as a friend and colleague for over 20 years and I have really struggled to find the words to do him justice, and express the depth of loss for me personally and for the TA community, professionally. His personality and contribution was huge and cannot be replaced. He was unapologetically himself, and for me perhaps the most important permission he provided to others was for them to be unapologetically themselves too.
Mark Head
I knew Mark from way back in the 90s when we were at college at the same time and he was Student Union officer. I was in awe of his energy, vibrant personality and wicked sense of humour (and that he carried his pet rat around in his pocket). He was like a whirlwind whirling through the corridors. He had time for everyone and anyone, I’m so sorry to hear of his untimely passing and send my sincere condolences to his husband, family, friends and colleagues.
Cathy B
What a man Mark was, leaving an indelible mark on all those who were lucky to meet him!
I worked with Mark at Salford University and I loved his humour, his authenticity and his irreverence. We had a reciprocal arrangement where we would teach each others students once a year, and our students always loved and remembered the sessions he delivered (once met never forgotten!).
Rest in peace Mark, you have been taken from the world too early, but you leave an incredible legacy. Sending much love to mark’s husband and family x
Sarah Kennedy
Met Mark many moons ago at Stradbroke College. I was 16 and Mark was always someone I could talk to for guidance, even back then. I might not have made a mark on his life but he certainly made mark in mine. I still often think what would Mark advise whenever there was a tricky situation. He will be missed by many and I'm blessed to have even been in his orbit. Love and condolences to those he left behind, his legacy will never be forgotten x
Debbi Dalton
I had the pleasure of having mark as my therapist over the darkest time of my life. If it wasn’t for him I wouldn’t be here today. I will be forever grateful of the help, love and humility I received from him. Condolences to his family, friends and loved ones. For me to of only known him a short amount of time and feel so saddened by his passing, I can only imagine the heartache that you all must feel.
Andrew Elston
I am deeply moved by reading all the wonderful tributes to Mark and all the shared memories. What an amazing impact Mark made on so many people and what gifts of healing, teaching, humour, authenticity, and caring he shared so generously.
Mark was an inspiring leader in our TA community. He was a highly intelligent communicator of TA theory and practice with a very pragmatic, commonsense approach to effective TA therapy. He understood the vital importance of research for the future recognition of our modality.
With his sudden tragic death, the TA world has lost a unique personality, a great advocate, and one of our finest ambassadors.
Above all we remember his friendship, his compassion, his generosity and his humanity. He deserves our deepest gratitude.
Alastair Moodie
I had only met mark at the start of this year when I joined one of his courses. Sadly, on the week the course began, my mother took gravely ill and I contacted Mark as I wasn't sure if I would be able to do the course.
He was so supportive and reassuring and I felt such a strong sense of his commitment to see me through, he gave me the courage to continue on the course I'd been so looking forward to doing.
As a teacher his humanity, deep empathy and heartfelt compassion shone through. His warmth and humour were infectious-he cheekily played to the stalls!
His passionate sense of justice infused the learning with an active urgency, that one could make a difference, to help the people we wanted to work with.
I was heartbroken on hearing of his passing. I had sent him an email at the end of the course in July thanking him for a great learning experience . I thanked him for his generosity in sharing some beautiful and very amusing stories from his own personal life which had brought the subject alive for me. His love and pride in his husband Philip and their relationship was awesome. My deepest deepest condolences to Philip. Mark never missed an opportunity to let us know how in love with his husband he was (and how much he fancied him after 16 years together!) The loss of that love must be terrible but to have had that love in life truly wonderful.
I feel blessed to have been a student of his and will endeavour to honour him through my practice by keeping his wise words of counsel with me.
Condolences to all who feel his loss.
sherald lamden
I only knew Mark for a very short time as my tutor but I thought he was an effervescent, funny, warm, caring human being. I am so shocked and saddened on his sudden passing and would like to pass on my sincere regards to Phillip and the rest of the family. Mark was an inspiration, unique, impactful and I’m so pleased I got the opportunity to be taught by him. 💔
Samantha Byrne
Mark was my colleague at Salford University for 11 years. He was a warm, engaging and passionate lecturer, as well as a kind person who cared deeply about justice and fairness. It was a delight to work with someone who probably swore more than me in lectures and my fondest memories of him are of the times we’d run into each other outside Mary Seacole when he was having a smoke. He’d always greet me with a hug. Mark was playful, often bolshy in meetings and rightly passionate about academic excellence. He was a bright star and I still can’t believe he’s left us. Good night and sleep tight Mark…you will be sorely missed.
Richard Bracegirdle
I knew Mark as a tutor, and group facilitator in my final year at uni, as a vibrant, genuine, fully himself person, generous with his energy and attention, knowledgable & encouraging and at the same time always playful, cheeky and irreverent. My heart goes out to Philip and everyone connected to Mark, with deep sadness for his passing and grateful for the colour, challenge, laughter and connection he brought to the world xx
Ruth Paterson
J'ai découvert Mark à travers son livre "Notions clés et pratiques cliniques en AT", traduit en français et au moment où je préparais mes examens TSTA.
Son livre m'a été d'une grande utilité.
Je le découvre également à travers tous les hommages qui lui sont rendus.
Regrets.
MAZOUZ Marleine
I had the great pleasure and privilege to be one of Mark’s PhD supervisors. What an amazing experience that was. He was so hardworking and dedicated. He was focussed and both inspired and inspiring. What a sad loss to psychotherapy research and the world!
Sue Wheeler
Mark was my therapist and my teacher, from whom I learned a lot about myself… and also about TA. Thank you, Mark.
Alastair
So shocked, so sad but also so glad that Mark was in this world and part of our TA family.
So much has been said and written about him but I can only echo how funny, irreverent, authentic, human and warm he was.
Thank you Mark for being you.
Heartfelt condolences to Philip, his family and friends and us all.
Rest in power Mark, you made a difference and left us all better off for having known you. What a man what a legacy.
💔 Ruma x
Ruma Verma
I am profoundly sad! It was beyond my thought. The great influential TA author Mark is no more. He helped me a lot while I was totally from a different country, different culture. The write up was so easy eye catching and comfortable as well. I read out the whole book 100 Key Points
& Techniques, I felt it was easy now for me. His clarification of TA theories and concepts and examples put me a crystal clear understanding. I truly became his fan as a imaginary trainee.That was a missing. Specially I felt that I can write. As I was on the CTA writing roller coaster time, and was the first cta trainee from Bangladesh.
Someday I felt a feeling of emptiness, nothing is going to happened, I can't move for a single line. Mark helped me there.I shifted my thought, throughout the TA jouney. Thanks for your support Mark. You will be cherished & remembeted by thousands TA aspirant’s for your modest approach and care. May you rest in peace!!!
Maksuda Begum
I'm grateful that Mark lived. He was special both intrinsically and to me. His contribution to my life and my work is immeasurable and it's hard to put into words, though one keeps coming up: permission. His existence was an embodied permission for me to be radically authentically me. His way of being in the world was a permission for me to build my own path. His last words to me were literally a very sweary and direct permission to develop my own direction and offer it out to the world, like Eric Berne did, like Mark did. He showed me that uniqueness is valuable and being oneself without shame or apology is important. I will coach, teach and live in gratitude to Mark.
Lucy Power
It is really hard to put into words the deep sadness I feel at the passing of such a remarkable, warm and thankfully imperfect human being.
Like so many others, I found Mark to be real and relatable - in one moment, sharing or explaining something that helped transform my understanding of Trauma theory or practice, in the next, making some witty, hilarious observation, making us all chuckle on screen.
Learning with Mark on the Trauma Certificate training was a joy and a privilege.
He was a rare human being, in how he interacted with people, myself included, to help us feel better about ourselves in different ways, whether students, clients, colleagues or friends.
He contributed so much to helping people in the world, and had an amazing compassionate heart for helping alleviate psychological pain and suffering. I think Mark was someone who truly knew how to love people.
Karen Horrocks
Mark was one of the quality lecturers I had the privilege to learn from at Salford. Quality because he knew his stuff, and he practiced his vocation. I loved that he was straightforward honest, no frills, funny, tell it how it is. His passion, empathy, and love for his work came through in every lecture and seminar. You felt it in the air. You could breathe it in. You might leave a lecture laughing out loud, or feeling challenged. When he was there, he filled the space. He held ethics and I values’ fiercely and true. He cared deeply about the work he did. I am gad there may be a recording or two on YouTube of him. Words fail me right now. I cannot do the man justice. He will be deeply missed.
Berny Sansome
I was so sad to hear of Mark's passing, and he was clearly loved by many and respected for his brilliant work. What a legacy to leave behind. I was due to attend the Trauma Focused Certificate course beginning at the end of September. I had heard only good things about Mark and his approach (and spicy language!), and I was so looking forward to both meeting him and learning from him. His loss is clearly going to leave a huge mark for many people both personally and professionally and - as I did silently back in August - I send my condolences to his husband, family and friends.
Chris Mooney
I was on two of Mark's trainings last year. He struck me as a breath of fresh air! His irreverence, his wicked sense humour, his potty mouth, his refusal to conform, his out loud and proud-ness, his passion for his clients and teaching and research - all felt wildly refreshing. He also drove me nuts with his chaotic admin but never pretended otherwise. He gave me so many permissions, not just as a trainee therapist but as a person, just by virtue of who and how he was. Thank you Mark for being so fearless and unapologetic. Your death and loss of your huge personality will leave an enormous hole. Rest in peace (or party like hell might be more your style!) : )
Bundle MacLaren
I’m late to the party, and as a fellow ADHD-er you knew about that, Mark. And of all people would never condem.
Due to your kindness and encouragement of mutual OK-ness and your permissiveness about authentic self-expression, you were trusted, appreciated, and loved.
You made a very positive impact in the world, on the psychotherapy scene, and in people’s hearts.
Your life was worth living. And thank you for living it.
Vauna x
Vauna Beauvais
I was saddened and shocked hearing of the passing of Mark. Mark was an examiner in my phd process and made me feel very comfortable about the process and his excitement about my research truly pushed me forward. I will remember his kindness.
Condolences to Mark's family, friends, and colleagues.
Karen Foran
I was so shocked and sad to hear the news of Mark's passing. Mark was so full of life and had so much of it left to live!
It's been very comforting to read these comments and to reflect on the huge impact Mark had on thousands of people. What a testament to him that he resonated deeply with so many people.
I'll always remember attending a lecture that Mark gave on working with LGBTQ clients when I was training at Salford several years ago. He was brimming with passion, heart and infectious energy.
Mark also led the counselling service at Salford when I volunteered there. Despite clearly having a lot on his plate, he always made time for me and also made a point of expressing his appreciation for the work I did. His care for clients shone through in every interaction we had. I was moved when I reread his warm, supportive and irreverent emails recently.
I'll particularly remember Mark for his warmth, intelligence and congruence. He was so real and that will continue to inspire me for years to come.
My heart goes out to Mark's husband, family, friends, clients, colleagues and students. He really was a special guy. Thank you Mark.
Corinna Hornsby-Walsh
I think it speaks volumes about the person Mark was that I never met him in person but was heart wrenchingly floored by the news that he is no longer on the earth with us. A loss that feels far too soon. My heart goes out to his husband and family will be devastated. I did a five day training with Mark on trauma online two years ago and it was such a pleasure because of Marks charisma. Being a therapist of the same generation I felt a huge connection with Mark and I loved everything about him☺️ I felt like I’d made a friend which is perhaps silly but is testimony to his warmth, kindness and ability to connect with people. I feel absolutely gutted that he’s gone and that I won’t get to do more training with such a special skilled and incredible human. Rest in power Mark the world is so much richer for you having been in it. I will remember you at gin o’clock or with a cuppa most fondly. Love and strength to all those mourning him.
Ginny Bates
I was lucky to know Mark when he supervised me on my MSc Supervision.
Both being from Sheffield, kicked started our relationship with lots of banter, colloquialisms, and humour. He was an excellent supervisor. Rigorous, thought provoking and always supportive.
I was gutted to hear of Mark’s death. A man so full of life. He will always be in my heart.
Jane Nixon
Mark introduced me to TA as a client many years ago. He talked a language that made sense and gave me a voice, when those around wanted to silence me. I found humour, compassion, empathy, authenticity and a wonderful man who "listened" and saw me.
I embarked on my own counselling training,
seeing my own clients and then opening up my own practice through his unwavering support, guidance, encouragement, exuberance, faith and pride in me.
Thank you from my heart Mark for everything that you did for me, especially "holding the light".
I won't forget you!
I love you. 💜
My sincere condolences to Philip and his family.
Susie Shaw
Mark embodied for me what initially drew me to TA. He had a talent for explaining and teaching concepts in such a clear and human way, I always came away feeling some of the enthusiasm he had alongside the learning.
I also want to acknowledge what a brilliant book 100 Key Points is, especially the recent edition, which I devoured pretty much cover to cover as I was writing a chapter for a book; it helped me think through the type of therapist I am and want to be, several years on from my original training. A great training and reflection guide.
Karen Macmillan
Mark had been my therapist for several years, and I owe so much to him. He helped me heal from deep trauma and grow as a person, and always with such sensitivity and insight. He genuinely changed mine and my husband's lives, and I will be eternally grateful to him. It's been really cathartic to read all these tributes and seeing how many lives he improved.
Ryan Creely
Following attaining my CTA in 2006, Mark became my supervisor for my Master of Science degree at The Berne Institute. His support, enthusiasm and warmth resonated within as he helped me to discard my “you’re not clever” Script until I achieved my MSc in Transactional Analysis in 2008. Sadly we sometimes do not realise how a person has impacted on our lives until they are gone. Mark was one of those special people to me. I will forever carry him in a special place in my heart.
Lynda Howell
I met Mark 16 years ago in Greece during my Master's Degree. He loved Greece and used to come every September with his adorable husband Philip. Mark introduced me to T.A. world. Mark was for me the whole world, teacher, supervisor, friend. I am so proud to be Mark's student. I will keep everything he taught me in my heart and I will continue to teach and do therapy with the same pathos and ethos he tauch me, in his way, in Marks' way. I love you Mark and I still do not know how I am going to manage without you...
Anna Chamilothoris
What terribly sad news. I always think back to him fondly and am so happy to have met him. I also effectively tell others what I learned from him because he passed it on so simply and sincerely. I carry him in my heart and understand that his loved ones and friends will miss him very much.
Katja Kestens
Condolences to Philip, family and friends of Mark. Mark was a special human being, authentic, funny, intelligent, compassionate. He brought light in other people's darkness. He has left an imprint on my heart and brain. I was so saddened to hear of his death so young. I feel blessed to have had him as a tutor.
Sheila Stone
From the first time attended one of your lectures with your passion, compassion, drive and unique way of teaching you inspired me. Thanks
Glyn
Glyn Kerr
My heart goes out to you Philip and Mark's family. I was shocked when I heard the news about Mark sudden death and I was left with the feeling of how unfair life is. From my own experience of Mark, I could see that his whole heart and soul were permeating each moment of his life, he was giving all and this is very inspiring! Goodbye Mark and thank you for your generosity.
Astrid M
Dear Mark, thank you for the times, the contact, your mind and your refusal to conform. You have become of the folk I walk with, I hope that's OK. We'll hold you with us. Much love
Bev Gibbons
I am so shocked and saddened at the loss of Mark. He was warm and empathetic with a wonderful gift for teaching and connecting with others. He had great sparkle and was instrumental in my journey to becoming a CTA psychotherapist. A heartfelt thank you to Mark. My condolences go to his husband, family and friends at this awfully sad time.
Marian Gittins
Mark, I was lucky enough to attend a couple of cpd with you. I came away thinking Wow! this guy brings energy, says what he means (no thrills) and I came away thinking Yes! . I scroll through your photo and think commitment, passion, and service! . Something that I admire and want to do myself. As i typed this i shed tears, but I don't know you. Something about you touched my soul this morning. Thank you
Helen Cobb
It has taken me a while to gather my thoughts and process Mark's passing and I am not sure I am fully there yet.
My dealings with Mark were mainly in my role as an organiser at the Humber Counselling and Psychotherapy Conference.
Mark presented our keynote at the inaugural conference in 2022 and, in true Mark style, absolutely inspired the crowd. When we invited him back for a second year, he was so humble, and so complimentary - he loved coming to Hull and described the conference in such warm terms.
He agreed to come back again in March 2025, and we were so looking forward to seeing him again. We will miss him, and will find a way to honour him. Mark's DNA will always run through the conference.
For me, Mark was inspiring. He knew his stuff inside out, mainly through an absolute passion for his subject, and for people. I admired that he said what he thought, and that absolutely gave me permission to do the same.
Permission was what I took from him. Permission to be me in the therapy room. Permission to improvise. Permission to use the models in ways client's will understand ("the trouble with TA is there are too many f**king circles Chris!).
I will miss your input Mark, the inspiration, the humour and your passion. I will continue to be inspired by you.
With love to Phillip and Mark's family.
Rest in Peace Mark.
Chris Colcomb
A generous, honest and dynamic man. Although I didn't know you well, your personality shone through all the same. You have left a strong and powerful legacy.
Martin Loughna
such an inspiration to the TA world, may you always be a light in the rainbow 🌈
sandra williams
Thank you for sharing your wisdom, passion, love and spirit. I only got to meet you briefly but what you shared has stayed with me. I hope I can live life as fiercely and as fearlessly. Truly a inspiration.
Alex Fisher
When you are fortunate enough to meet someone enlightened, quick-witted, inspirational, encouraging and with such an infectious zest for life and TA, you will always remember them. They leave an invisible mark and you are always able to recall the impact they have had on you. Mark was one of those gems. I shall miss the lost opportunities to have worked with you more. Party on Mark.
Alana B
Mark I knew you as therapist trainer and then as a valued colleague. I loved your openness, irreverance and passion. You will be deeply missed.
Lin Cheung
I met Mark one time in my life. I was a 21 year old undergrad student and I was keen to explore working in therapy. Through some contacts, I reached out to Mark and received a reply email back from him almost immediately inviting me round to his house to have a chat about his career and give some guidance to my potential next steps. I spent a few hours with him as he gave advise and support in different areas of training and experience that I might pursue. I went on to do my TA foundational year with his advise and completed my doctorate in counselling psychology. That was almost 15 years ago now. Although only being in his presence one time, mark regularly kept in touch. I actually had a messenger exchange with him just a few months ago. He would often reach out and celebrate my successes with me show continual care and support. Mark was a key figure in shaping my career and I am eternally grateful for that one meeting that we shared. I was so sad to hear about his passing. My memories of him will be that he was a man of great care and character.
Fraser Smith
I first met you Mark when you were a trainee. At some point we must have both attended a group where I shared some of my childhood experience. Some years later you told me in another group setting what had been the impact on you of my experiences and the resulting Script decisions I had made, and In that instant I felt seen heard and understood. You "got me" even though we never engaged in therapy. You had a skill to see between the lines and account the human. As a result I asked you to tutor/supervise my dissertation for MSc. having had no academic experience prior to CTA this was a challenge to me. You challenged and supported me in a way that was far more than the sum of the parts. I will forever be grateful for your part in my journey. Since the shock of your passing I have seen that in sharing everyone says something very similar. You had a powerful skill to engage with the person in front of you as if they were most important. You connected with the core of the person that filled so many gaps in their history inspiring confidence in their ability. Mark you will be so missed in the TA community and your inspiration will live on in all the people you engaged with. Who knows what they will achieve. Farewell dear man.
Mo Felton
Mark made very many contributions to IJTARP up to the time EATA stopped supporting it. As well as articles, he was active as a Reviewer and on the Advisory Board. There was then a gap in our contact until the Bowers & Widdowson draft arrived. So many people had ceased contact with me after the EATA incident followed by me being blamed for the cancellation of the 2020 conference, so I asked Mark if he meant to send it to TAJ. He told me he had been struggling with ADHD for some years, made comments that showed me he understood the problems of keeping an open-access journal running and the difficulties caused when universities only supported big publishers, and that “Yes, having the article open access is really important to me and to the other author. We want our work to be freely available. As such IJTARP is journal of choice. I think the expectation by publishing companies of having authors pay astronomical amounts to have their work is outrageous.” This was in November 2022 and we published the article in June 2023. I very much regret there will be no future contact with him. It has taken until now to manage to write this – sadly he joins so many of my friends in the TA community who have died – but he was too young!
Although the articles by him in IJTARP are easily accessible in several places, I have collected them together and they can be seen at
https://juliehay.org/widdowson
Julie Hay
I will miss Mark's deep knowledge and abundant infectious enthusiasm for research, TA, Education in its widest sense and for life.
James Sweeney
A bright light has been lost and a hole has been left.
Mark seemed such a charismatic, passionate and vibrant person that possessed a power to calm and connect to himself, a person, a group of people and even whole communities.
Your wisdom, care and youthful exuberance will be greatly missed.
Hannah Coupland-Smith
Mark, for me, was mercurial. So dynamic, irreverent, incorrigible and utterly catalytic. He brought about change in others. I loved his unique, permission-giving nature. Whenever I spent time with Mark, I felt freed up and was left caring much less about what others might think of me. He was also catalytic in his research and writings, bringing about clinical accuracy and simplicity. I know he was beginning to make his mark in the EMDR world.
Mark was my supervisor for many years and supported me as I was endorsed for TSTA in Germany. Working online was much less common then, so I used to visit him in his office at the University of Salford. I fondly remember these visits, as he restored my confidence on each journey.
The other main arena where I shall remember Mark is The Berne Institute at Kegworth, UK. He was one of the facilitators of the Professional Excellence Workshops. Watching him work with others and be on the receiving end of his interventions was a delight. Mark supported me with my MSc dissertation and has been instrumental in developing me into a researcher.
What a lovely introject to hold in my heart!
Andy Williams
I was incredibly saddened by the news that Mark had died. He was one of my original trainers at the CPTI in Edinburgh. I couldn't fail to be touched by his boundless energy,enthusiasm and humour. He showed me kindness and warmth during my CTA preparation. Fast forward to 2020 when I contacted him to ask for advice where to do my PhD ' come here I'll supervise you'. I am sad He won't be there to celebrate with me. I do feel as one of his PGRs in some way a part of his legacy. His love of research and how he offered encouragement and strokes.
I send love to his partner, family and friends at this shattering time.
Carol Remfrey Foote
Mark probably knew me better than anyone. He was my therapist for the past 11 years and changed my life immeasurably for the better. When I met him I was living with a long standing eating disorder, regular self-harm, a diagnosis of borderline personality disorder, and the recent cancer diagnosis of my brother. In the preceding years I’d been through multiple therapists, a traumatic hospitalisation, and deemed ‘resistant to treatment’.
Mark began seeing me as part of a research project: treating major depression with 20 sessions charged at £10 each. Several years later he was still charging me £10 a session (I gave him a raise when I qualified as a therapist. I don’t think he would ever have asked)
Mark met me with a combination of incredible gentleness and a firm guiding hand. After getting to know him I feel especially struck by the slow and quiet gentleness he gave me at the start - I needed it. He was alongside me throughout every difficult experience in my adult life, expecting nothing but always having complete faith in me. Over the years he gradually showed me more of himself. I grew to love him, his sharp and raucous humour, and his remarkable existential optimism.
I’ve been struggling to put into words how exactly Mark helped me to grow. At the heart of it is this, he showed me how to love more completely and honestly, and with less fear.
Mark accepted me absolutely as I was, whilst also believing (and telling me) I could do better.
When my brother died he helped me find great pride in the love and care my family gave Max and, without shying away from the horror and pain of the loss, to also find all the ways that I still carry him within me.
I love that he watched me grow up, and how proud and glad he was to see me become so much happier and so much more peaceful. I’m a therapist myself now, closer to my parents than I thought possible, in a long-term loving relationship, and trying to have a baby. I haven’t hurt myself for a long time. Although I still experience major depressive episodes (he guided me through a frightening eating disorder relapse just earlier this year) I now know how to support myself through them and to seek help without shame when I need it. I know I will have a good life full of love and will be able to cope even without Mark alongside. I can’t find the words to express the gratitude I have for him.
It is clear that Mark leaves an uncommon legacy in the hearts of all the people whose life he touched. I’m sure he will be commemorated in many ways as time goes on, but I suspect he would take greatest pride in this living legacy.
I feel completely shattered by Mark’s death and the irreplaceable hole he leaves in my life, but he has helped me to grieve before. I will carry his memory in my heart, his voice in my head, and live well, remembering him with all the love I have.
Helen Levens
На завжди в моєму серці ...🙏
Valentyna to
It was strange when I found out about Mark's passing. The night before I declared to my partner that "I must message Mark in the morning to let him know I can't do Tuesday's next month." and then the next morning as I was prepping my day and getting ready to write emails and do admin I read he had passed.
Mark had so many planned brewing and everything was exciting about the future when chatting to him.
Whilst things may be taking a pause after his news, I'm sure many of his future plans will continue to grow in memory of him.
Ness Cooper
So so upset to learn of Mark’s sudden passing.
I engaged in therapy with Mark to help overcome previous relational trauma. Mark absolutely changed my life - he helped me first make sense of my experiences then process them. I thought of getting in touch only a few weeks ago - when I became a first time mum at the start of August. I wanted to tell Mark my news and thank him again -
I truly believe I would not be where I am today without him - in a happy healthy relationship and my little boy may never have been.
Reading all the tributes is testimony to what a wonderful person he was both personally and professionally. Such a huge, heartbreaking loss.
Thank you Mark, rest easy x
Beth
I met Mark when we worked together in Glasgow. I am a Person Centred Counsellor and Supervisor but was meeting Mark as a client. He touched me deeply at a time when I was personally struggling with loss. His empathy, care, love and compassion were very evident and very healing for me. I was a nurse for 20 years before counselling and Mark and I shared memories of that journey often! His laughter, wisdom and big heart were shared. When Mark moved to Manchester I missed him greatly. I was very shocked to hear the news of his death so suddenly and unexpectedly. The outpouring of love for him since the news emerged is very humbling and joyful. I do hope Mark knew how much he was loved.
His presence will be enormously missed by all who knew him. I have not been able to get him out of my head since, like many others have shared. I was talking to a colleague in Greece last week and she shared this way of expressing condolences in Greece " May you live to remember him" I have found that very helpful. Sending love and prayers to Phillip and all Mark's wider family and friends.
With love, Mairi
Mairi McMenamin
Shock, saddened disbelief unreal how can you so full of life be gone.
I was flicking through my notes for some Markisms to make me smile
" Woke up and Philip asked if I wanted a cup of tea in bed now a full Yorkshire breakfast is a pot of tea and three cigarettes
Philip is always hungry eats far more sweets than any child I know but has a six pack I eat three fucking crackers and a bit of cheese and bumph.
He only wanted half a bagal for breakfast I thought it was a bit odd.
Philip went out and I found the panatone packet ripped up and shoved down the side of the bin.
Now theres three types of guilt, guilt, catholic guilt and Irish catholic guilt so I knew he was suffering with Irish catholic guilt only other guilt similar is polish catholic guilt and they both like potatoes as well
Any way he comes home and says I have something to tell you he’s riddled with the guilt anyway I said I know you ate the panatone"
"No body tells you adult life is going to be about being knackered and having a bad back. "
"We get regular cat engagements it doesn’t matter what your doing the cat decides its more important. It comes up close to the screen and either the viewer or the owner gets a good view of the cats bum. I think this is what the internet was invented for"
"The LGBTQ+ community are quite used to being treated like shit, also good at detecting acceptance from tolerance you can shove your tolerance up your arse not interested."
These are just a few of the classic Markisms that we will miss.
Much love to the sweet eating Phillip
Hazel Stilgoe-McCombe
Dear Mark, I have been postponing writing on your tribute site. I just couldn’t find the words.
And then, just now, the song “I’m sexy and I know it”….came by on a playlist, and that inspired me.
Because this is a great song to dance to, it brings a smile to my face and its music and lyrics feel so much like you. I can just see you dancing to it with all your charm, enthusiasm and fun…. A wonderful image to have and one to come back to.
And I will need that…..when I feel the sadness about your sudden death and the impact that has on me, as on so many people. All of us, whom you’ve given your love, endless knowledge and wisdom.
My heart goes out to Philip and other loved and dear ones. And to everyone else whose heart you’ve touched.
Thank you, dear Mark!
We’ll keep you and your memory alive.
Mirjam
Mirjam te Slaa
Thank you for enlightening my journey. Learned a lot from Mark . It’s a loss that I miss the opportunity meeting you .
Veedy S
Mark, what an amazing man! I feel soooo lucky to have had you as my lecturer! I don't think you would have ever understood the impact you had on me personally. I remember sitting in my first ever counselling skills practice session and doubting myself so much on becoming a counsellor due to adhd and worrying I couldn't keep my mouth shut 😅 then came you and you shared you had adhd and I instantly felt safe to be me. You were so successful so it felt achieveable! For the first time ever! The day after I had a tough life experience but I thought about your lecture and knew I had to come back to uni and not let it set me back. Those Wednesday sessions with you and Debbie really did get me through a dark time and I will forever be grateful for you showing me that it is fine to be a counsellor with adhd! And not being too serious is fine! You were amazing! Hope you carry on fanning your see you next Tuesday fan 😉❤️❤️❤️ thinking of all of your loved ones ❤️
Vicki Bell
When my husband broke the terrible news to me last week, I was at first in disbelief. Until it dawned on me that Mark was actually no longer amongst us… I was overwhelmed by an intense sadness, it feels like I have lost a close family member...
In addition to Mark's many TA insights, he was also an important role model in my life as a gay man. I am very grateful to him for the many explicit and implicit permissions and strokes that I received and during a difficult moment in our marriage, Mark's interventions actually helped us out. In the meantime, we have been happily together for 21 years.
I dare to use a number of quotes such as "take the shit and put it on the roses" and "opinions are like a*holes, everyone has one and some of them stink", with clients 😊
When Mark was in the room, there was always a good atmosphere. I love you, Mark, brilliant man with your quirky humor. I will deeply miss you. You will always have a special place in my heart.
Maurits Baeyens
I wrote to Mark randomly from India saying that a group of us wanted to replicate his depression research and would he be willing to guide us. To my delight, I got a response almost immediately in the affirmative. He showed up cheerfully and offered to meet us once a month to handhold us through the effort. He was always smiling and full of humour. The group would be in splits with all the funny things he would say. Yet, in all that humour was so much wisdom. What will stay with me is his generosity. There was no need for him to make the kind of time that he did for us. He reviewed our writing and was always full of praise. He gave feedback in the gentlest possible way. His presence was warm and electrifying. I am still in shock that he is no more! It is unbelievable. It is a huge loss to our community.
Aruna Gopakumar
I have known Mark as a colleague at the Berne for a few years now, but we really got to know each other spending time waiting for a plane to catch to Amsterdam. His joy in life, love and friendship with Philip, and endless stories were sheer fun. Last November, when I drove home from attending a workshop redecision with Mark and Mil Rosseau, I listened to the song The Book of Love from Peter Gabriel. It captured for me what I had seen the previous days. I had noticed that Mark read peoples lives to them, from a loving perspective. It was as if he sang to us our potency, our love for live, our hearts. With the endless message that life is really worth living to the full. Somehow, he created the way to browse back to chapters where to find love, connection, acceptance And sang to us. I saw him do this over and over again and realised that he was doing this all over the world. I loved him for it and know this example and inspiration to do this as a professional will never leave me. Thank you so much Mark, I miss you.
Beatrijs Dijkman
Mark was my therapist for 18 months and also briefly my tutor during my time studying for the TA diploma.
Mark taught me the value of authenticity, the power of using the fucks you are given wisely and the restorative calm of a cup of tea. I loved when he turned things into “another bloody chance for a learning experience”- this has stuck with me and I realise how much his internal voice echoes in times of adversity.
He was deliciously inappropriate whilst oozing goodness and wisdom.
I can’t believe he’s gone.
Sending deepest condolences to you Philip and may you take comfort in knowing how much he changed lives.
Carole McKenzie
“Remember — be warm, be human, be real, be you!” Those are the words with which Mark signed my copy of his book.
Thank you, Mark, practicing what you preach, for being warm, being Human, being real and being you! It feels like you give people around you permission to be themselves. And I use the Present tense as you carry on doing so through your book, recording of your trainings, your papers, countless pictures and videos you are in.
Thank you for being you.
You will remain in my heart forever, and I will remember you every time I take another sip of tea before facing my challenges. I am happy to have met you in my life.
Thank you, Mark.
My deepest condolences to everyone who knew Mark. My deepest condolences to Philip 💔
Tetiana Pekarchuk
Dear Mark, Thank you for seeing me, and believing in my work.
Your generous heart and bright mind lives on in the people you have touched and the extraordinary contributions your work makes. Rest well,
Zara Irani
Connected with him in 2012 through his book "100 keys to TA". He has been communicating with me since the first read.. He has been guiding to create more awareness on TA.. His contributions are eternal.. With wholehearted Gratitude..🙏 Suresh B Kalapurakkal 🇮🇳
Suresh B Kalapurakkal
Mark was just a special human who had copious amounts of time for his students at Salford university. He shaped me into the counsellor I am and helped me when I qualified in getting started with clients. I feel so privileged to have been taught by him. I'm deeply saddened by his passing. Heaven has gained the most funny, caring, passionate man I've ever met. Rest easy Mark I'll miss you 💙
Nicola Smith
I was lucky enough to meet Mark and have him as a trainer for workshops in Bucharest. He was my favourite trainer. I learned from him that it’s ok to use humour in therapy. I loved his stories and display of vulnerability, but also his serious side and professionalism. He will be missed!
Andreea Orheanu
Not only did I have the privilege of getting to know Mark as the sponsor of my MSc research, but I also felt a deep connection to him long before we met, through my years of close reading of his 100 key TA concepts and his numerous academic papers. His work had already shaped my understanding and approach, and meeting him in person only deepened my appreciation for his intellect and dedication. Mark’s generosity with his time and feedback was a testament to his commitment to fostering growth in others, and his guidance played a crucial role in my academic journey.
Beyond his academic brilliance, Mark's sense of humour brought a refreshing lightness to our interactions, making the learning process not just effective but also enjoyable. He had a unique way of making complex ideas accessible while maintaining a warm and approachable demeanour. His sudden passing is a profound loss, but his influence and the knowledge he imparted will continue to guide me and I'm sure many others who were fortunate enough to learn from him. Rest in peace Mark.
Claire Daplyn
Mark,
You really lit up the TA world when I had only just begun on the journey. Your humour, compassion and straight talking was so refreshing.
I did your couples course and enjoyed it so much, I will always be grateful for the confidence you inspired in me and for being such a wonderful role model - in being real.
It's a shame you left this earth as you shone so bright and the world was so lucky to have you touch it for as long as it did.
Love to your partner, friends and family as you will be a huge hole to fill.
Be in peace x
Alice Brooks
Dear Mark,
I was shocked to read about your sudden passing. I wish your family and friends beautiful memories about their connection with you.
My memories about you started in March 2019 at the PEW in Kegworth. Your energy was so contagious. Your Free Child was hard to ignore! You also shared so much of your knowledge and vision about TA and the TA community.
I will miss your TA-spirt and your laughter. I hope you’ll stir up things where ever you went!
Patrick Odendaal