Marian Elaine Anderson

I have so enjoyed reading all of the memories about Lainey and am feeling like I missed out! I was always very fond of Lainey and loved seeing her sitting in her “office” on the dock at Iron City. She was always engaging and full of good cheer and I enjoyed our encounters. I just wish they had been more frequent. I envy all of your wonderful memories of time spent with her, she was a special person.
My heartfelt condolences to everyone in the Anderson family. Clearly you have lost a vital member of your family. Iron City has also lost a valued member of our community.
Love and best wishes to all of you.
Missy & Jaime

I'm one of Lainey's English friends and wanted to tell you how so sorry I was to hear she'd died. It was a shock, actually. I knew she was very ill but thought she'd have a bit longer as she'd sounded fairly upbeat on the phone and told me the medications she was taking were working. I should have known better that she was just being her usual brave self. Poor Lainey, she'd already had such a bad time with her arthritis.

We met in Florence in the early Sixties when we were both about 19. Like all of us out there, she was having a stint abroad before settling down.

But Lainey wasn't that interested in Italy and not long after took off to somewhere much more to her liking - Club Vagabond, haunt of mountaineers and climbers in the Swiss Alps. She must have been very happy working there because she stayed for several years. I'm not sure what she did exactly, even though I stayed there for two nights myself! A lot of her English friends dated back to her time at the Vagabond.

Lainey had a talent for making - and holding onto - friends.

I didn't hear from her for a while. When I did she must have started her job at American Express. But before too long she was over here in her time off work, looking up her friends. I remember one day being amazed to spot Lainey at the other end of the carriage when I was going to work on the London Underground. I caught her eye and she made her way towards me, greeting me joyfully. Once she'd found us all she kept coming for about 60 years. Apart from Pam's family in Dorset, who were always her first priority, she was mostly staying with, or meeting up with, with people she'd originally met through being Italy and Switzerland.

Latterly she used to come over every October without fail, staying at the Strand Palace hotel, which she used as a base. Jan, Barbara and I used to get plenty of advance warning so we made sure we didn't miss her.

I think she thought of the UK as her second home. She seemed to love everything about it - except the weather and our chilly houses.

Lainey loved our dogs and made such a fuss of them. I am so glad she had Pepe and then Bella to keep her company after she retired. I'm looking out for a photo of her taken in one of the pubs on Wimbledon Common, with my dog sitting beside her. She wouldn't have wanted me to come without her.

Lainey was a one-off. She was a strong woman, sharp as a tack, outspoken and funny.

It's odd that in a few days time October will be here and for the first time in literally an age, Lainey will not be here. We will all miss her very much.


Julia Lewis

Hey there Anderson family !!!!!
Doesn’t anyone one of us 23 or 25 attendees at illustrious HFBar Ranch recall our horseback thrills ?!!!
Lainey took the lead as a good rider & suggested we ride toward her all together !! It was truly a family romp (aka a crazy race ) to meet Lainey on her horse ?) far away 👍
Lainey loved seeing us all on horses of many sizes coming toward her ….as she had suggested she ride ahead and we charge all together to catch up to her …WOW !!!!
We made HFBar ranch history with the stampede that actually got us in trouble at dinner !!
Watching mom ,Miney on her bucking stallion up on her horses back legs was amazing as she had full control as the awesome equestrian she was !!!
Watching Miney in was impressive but most of us had our horses bumping in to each other !!!
What a fun highlight for us Anderson adventure seekers ….despite getting scolded :-(. Chiz made a good decision to not ride 👍….
Thank you Lainey for your bold FUN idea and thank you Mom & Dad for taking us all on a fabulous trip to Buffalo Wyoming ranch called HFB ranch … 👏👏👏👏

Aunt Lainey had a lively presence. She was quick to make a connection with just about anyone and encourage a smile or laugh. I know I felt prompted to be engaged and upbeat around her, and why not?

I have memories of Lainey from childhood that make me chuckle. She would lean down low and make a duck noise in my ear whenever we saw each other. It's hard to describe the sound, and perhaps the other nieces and nephews recall this, but it was clever, original and a connection she established. She also used to tell me that I was a 'number ten'. Meaning my temper tantrums were consistently calibrated at maximum volume. I think I was supposed to be proud of this. She stopped telling me this as I became a adult, perhaps coyly waiting to see if one of my kids displayed the same natural innate talent (and they both do!).

My husband Mike & I, and our then toddler Ramsey, were able to meet Lainey and Pam for dinner in Boston a few years ago. A rare visit, of a small scattered assemblage of the larger Anderson clan. She ordered us to find a seat at the table and choose something off the menu with Lobster in it. We were struck by the juxtaposition of personalities in this longterm friendship- Pam with her kind smile and Lainey in her command. A testament to her loyal nature.

I am thankful for the times I got to spend with Lainey, sometimes brief and spaced apart, due to our busy lives. But I know her spirit will live on in the family, and I will miss her.

Lainey was the "favorite aunt." While initially a self-proclaimed title, it was one she took great pride in achieving and maintaining. Whenever I think of a reunion with Lainey, it was always a matter of time before she worked her moniker into a conversation—either as a statement, reminding everyone of her prestigious title, or with a sense of inquiry, seeking affirmation that no new competition had emerged to overthrow her.

Lainey was supportive, loving, and, at times, abrasively honest. In my teenage years, I recall her as a figure who would not entertain my nonsense. She was strict, and rightfully so. My maturation was met with her joviality and pride. Lainey took great pride in our family's past, and I cherished being a part of how she celebrated our present.

It hurts to acknowledge that future events will take place without Lainey. I always imagined she would participate in future weddings, reunions, and trips to ICFC. Her absence will be deeply felt, and I will miss my favorite aunt dearly.

We first met Lainey in the mid 1960's when zhe came to the UK with my sister Pamela. Since then, and I cannot quite believe it is sixty years, Lainey came to visit us every year and we are going to miss her visits very much. Farewell good friend. Nigel and Kay Williams

My aunt Lainey was sharp - and it wasn't easy sneaking much past her. If you had something going on that you preferred not to highlight and attempted to gloss over it, her next question was a direct inquiry about whatever that might be. And you had to choose your words carefully because you knew where they were going: everywhere.

But I loved her for it. She often reminded me of a brightly-colored chirpy old bird. I sometimes felt she would be a perfect character for the game of Clue. She was insightful and witty, always up for some engaging banter or to sit quietly and read some 400-page hardback that I had never heard of. My understanding is that they were mostly trashy novels that unfolded in one rarified court or another. I always had this feeling that a really important half of her life was lived abroad and that she had deep roots and connections to Europe and Great Britain, though I never experienced it with her.

Being the oldest of the cousins, I do remember her working at AmEx and utilizing her services for my big trip to Europe during college and was impressed by her capability and expertise. I never realized that she passed up opportunities to advance to continue doing what she loved. In many ways, it seemed like she found her lane - and the things to which she was drawn - and carved a happy life within that lane.

I moved from Seattle to NYC in the fall of 2003, just after Chizzy passed and during the period where Lainey was caretaking he and Miney in Princeton. The house was dark and stuffy and It wasn't the pleasantest of times, but I had some very nice visits with them and I was so grateful that Lainey was there for both of her parents and that Christine was not far away.

About a month ago, I heard that Lainey wasn't doing well and I drove up to see her from NYC at my first opportunity. I wasn't always in regular contact with her, but she was such reliably good company and as others have noted - not one to burden others with complaints or gripes of her own. That Sunday, I found her diminished but quite lucid, and had a lovely afternoon with her. Admittedly, her spirit seemed a bit broken for having had to give away Bella, and I was so sad that there was no way for her maintain that companionship in her final days.

She was so thoroughly devoted to her communities - British, ICFC, family and otherwise. We all benefited richly for her presence and I know I speak for many others when I say how saddened I am that she has left us. At the next opportunity, let us raise a Margarita or a glass of Coke with ice to her!

I met Lainey when I moved to Boston in 1969 after graduating from college. I worked with Pam, and she told me that her roommate Lainey and I would get along. We soon discovered that Lainey, Pam and my roommate Marie played tennis. They insisted I learn to play tennis so we could play doubles, and that was the beginning of many good times (including weekends at Mittersill). When I moved back to Chicago after a few years, Lainey and I continued our friendship. We talked about books and movies and TV via frequent phone calls. In the days before the internet, if one of us had a question about entertainment trivia, we would call the other to get the answer. We took many trips together. Lainey joined my family vacations in Maui, Sanibel, Key West and Turks and Caicos. Lainey was a singular presence, famous for her good cheer; her love of Margaritas, piña coladas and Legal Seafoods; and her boundless interest in her friends and family. I will miss her. My family joins me in wishing her bon voyage.

19 September 2024
I,Ryan to many, "Rhino!" to some & a "wee" bit odd to others & on a
admittedly strange orbit through the universe would, through the decades, occassionally intersect, in close proximity, to the"Anderson Clan" solar system,for events great or small,& be always entranced by
at it's vibrant core was always Lainey with great enthusiasm for friends
& family & radiant "Zest!"
If there is an afterlife & a great reunion of kindred spirits,..& we should be so lucky, we will find Lainey already there "Zestfully!"
welcoming us & likely a wild pack of chihuahuas scampering about!
...we should be so lucky!
Ryan "Rhino!" Cramer

I knew Lainey for most of her life. She was especially close to my sister Shari who was her exact age, and died 2 years ago. When I was finally allowed to disclose Shari’s cancer diagnosis Lainey was the first person she wanted me to tell. Sadly Shari did not live long after that - her diagnosis came too late to cure her - but from that moment Lainey was the most supportive, compassionate friend imaginable. They were truly lifelong friends, and Lainey helped to scatter Shari’s ashes at ICFC. I like to think they are happily reunited now.
She was my friend also - what an upbeat, positive person! Always so much fun to be with! She never complained about her many disabilities and enjoyed every day. I talked to her about once a week for the last several years. The last two weeks of her life, for the first time ever, she sounded so down and I was very afraid for her. Having to give up her apartment, and especially her beloved Bella, hit her so hard.
I am heartbroken that she is no longer in this world. I miss her very much 💔. Anne Stronach

This is from an old friend from George School , my,Quaker boarding school I attended in the early 70’s

What a remarkable face. I don’t know anything about her but the photos I’ve seen in the last day or two are very striking. Those eyes! Intense, joyful, kind, youthful, full of enthusiasm, curiosity, energy, graciousness, generosity, a spirit of acceptance, love, a lack of judgementalism, seeing the good in people. I know nothing about her, she’s a complete stranger to me, but looking at her face I feel as if I know a lot about her.

Lainey was my sister-in-law and one of the most interesting people I’ve known. I have many fond memories of times when we lived in the Boston area near Lainey.

Shortly after my engagement to Duncan, Lainey invited me to a weekly tennis match with her to which I agreed. I was not warned about her strong forehand, her consistent serve, nor her good court movement , and promptly lost match after match against her. Early on, though, I realized that it was the post-match lunches that were important to her. She used the opportunity to fill me in (aka indoctrinate) me on history, lineage, and personalities of the Anderson, Brown, McCague, and McCook families that I was marrying into. I appreciated every word—

Lainey did not present as a good cook, but she did cook for us when we visited her home. It was always “Mrs. Noseworthy”, a lasagna-like concoction that was never the same, but always tasty. I thought of it as Lainey’s signature dish/—until the 7-layer Mexican dip recipe appeared!

We invited Lainey, Pam, and Vladimir to dinner and Lainey offered to bring an appetizer. Thinking it would be a box of crackers and cheese, I was shocked to see her arrive with a full bag of groceries over her shoulder. She loudly announced that she was making the 7-layer dip and demanded cutting boards, knives, mixing bowls, measuring cups. The slicing and dicing began with the 4 of us peering over her shoulder not quite sure what to make of it. Approximately 1 minute in, we lost all power and were in total darkness. Lainey then demanded “candles! Flashlights! more candles!”. We remained huddled around her while she cooked, this time to make sure the house didn’t burn down from all the candles! The dip materialized and was delicious, showing us that it wasn’t that Lainey couldn’t cook— she chose not to.

Lainey was very intelligent and capable. She was a travel agent for American Express for most of her career. What is impressive is that during those years she was frequently the top-producing agent for all of Amex. She was repeatedly offered promotions and management positions— She turned them all down. She was completely happy to be able to interact daily with her clients and travel friends, and to travel the world. A bigger job would have taken away that flexibility and so was of no interest to her.

Lainey lived her life as she chose and left this life on her own terms.

Lainey, we will miss your strong, intelligent, colorful, and vibrant presence.

Bon Voyage, Lainey,

Janet Anderson

Lainey was my aunt and godmother. Growing up in Boston, I got to see Lainey frequently when I was little. I loved visiting Lainey’s apartment, seeing pictures from her exotic trips, her giraffe statues, and her Mrs Noseworthy lasagna that she would make for special occasions. She had so many wonderful pictures of her family and friends, and collages of family reunions on her walls. I will always remember Lainey taking me to Beauty and the Beast on ice when I was little. We got ice cream at the arena, which was our secret for at least a decade since we told my mom we had bananas!

Lainey loved Iron City, and the community of family and friends that convened every summer. You could often find her reading at her “office”, an Adirondack chair on the dock with a great view of the bay.

Lainey loved bright colors! I rarely saw her without at least one hot pink, purple, or bright blue article of clothing, and her pink lipstick. When I asked her about her new car once, she told me her only requirement was that it be bright blue.

Lainey’s children were her pets, especially her dogs Pepe and Bella. She was an expert at sneaking Pepe anywhere in a bright Vera Bradley bag so they never had to be apart.

Most of all, Lainey treasured her family and friendships, and especially loved her annual visits to the UK. She was a model for keeping in touch, and always knew everyone’s updates. To her friends reading this: I hope you know how special you were to her. Thank you for being a source of such joy for her.

Lainey, we will miss you, but I know you’re happy to be home with Miney, Chizzy, Pam, Shari, and Pepe.

Sad news to hear of Lainey's passing away, thank you for being such a brilliant friend to Pamela and fir looking out for Vladimir after Pamela passed away 3 years ago. I know the Anderson family loved my sister Pamela and we always enjoyed Lainey's visits to the UK. She always knew so much about our country and we all held Lainey close to our hearts. Good night Lainey, with grateful love for all you did for Pamela and Vladimir xx

I remember as a kid there was one time when I was left alone at home and I couldn’t reach my parents. I can’t remember if I was sick or just a bit scared but I called my Aunt Lainey. Of course, she lived in a different state and couldn’t come to my rescue, but we just spoke on the phone and she took my mind off things and helped to comfort me. She could be very blunt and sarcastic and funny, but when you were vulnerable with her she would return it. I loved the years I lived in London when she would come for her annual visit. We’d go out for dinner or high tea together and she would switch to using British lingo and fill me in on all the gossip from friends and family. She always stayed at the Strand hotel where she had become BFFs with the doorman and all the staff. I’m glad I got the chance to build my own relationship with her over that time. I admire how much she loved to travel and managed to stay in touch with all her friends across the globe. I will always think of her when I think about the UK, ICFC, chihuahuas (or any dog in a handbag), brightly colored sneakers, a salt shaker, and probably many other seemingly silly things.

With Love,
Bobam

Dear Christine,
Lainey was such a kind person and my husband Drew and I used to have a happy time with her when she came to stay in Scotland.
She wrote me such a beautiful letter when he died..I am sure we all have happy memories of
her and know she will be greatly missed.
I was so glad to hear from Julia that you were able to be by her side.
Losing a sibling is not easy, it is just so final.
My thoughts are with you all.
Please give my best wishes to Duncan, Cynnie, Meg and send you my love.
Barbara xx

Dear Christine and all the Anderson Clan

I am so very sorry to hear that Lainey has passed away. My mum, Barbara, has let me know.

Lainey and I had our annual lunch in Covent Garden, London last September and she was on tremendous form. I'm very sad that will be the last margarita we share. (My mum remembers her having to go behind the bar in Scotland back in the 1970s to teach the barman how to make one!). It was always a real treat to see her and hear how you are all doing and she was always interested to hear how my family were getting on.

I've known Lainey all my life since mum met her in Italy and she visited my parents Barbara and Drew in Scotland many times when I, and my brother Oliver, were little.

I will always be so grateful for her kindness when I came to live in Boston for 6 months when I was 18. She kept an eye out for me and we shared many fun dinners.

It has been such a treat to be able to see Lainey in London each September. This autumn will just not be the same at all.

My love to you all in dealing with her loss. She was such a character that she must leave a big hole in your lives. She so loved you all and loved being part of the Anderson family.

With my love
Pauline xx

My dearest friend Lainey, I don't know where to start because my US diary is long and complicated- …. I came from Switzerland to New York City in Manhattan in the Spring of 1970. and after some time with a friend of yours named Bob Young, we came with your invitation to meet you in Princeton hundreds of times. We spent wonderful days with you and your family - Over time we had the opportunity to become very fond of you and your beloved parents Miney and Chizzy who over the time also adopted us as their children, me and Bob Young, who after some time also became mine Husband. There was also a friendly understanding with your brother and sisters. We had so much fun hearing about your adventures when you took your trips to Switzerland. in Leysin. Ours was a friendship that lasted 54 years. I returned to Switzerland and we still tried to maintain our relationships at a distance. We spoke a few months ago and I was very pleased to hear news from the USA. I will miss you Lainey, you were very special to me. Rest in peace dear, we will see each other again surrounded by our many animals that you too loved madly. ** sorry if my written English is not correct ** Helen.

Lainey is my eldest sister of 12 years. As a child I was intimidated by her because she was stricter than our parents. Being the eldest she was often put in the position to mind the rest of us which seems pretty challenging. She always said Mum and Dad never let 5 children get in the way of their social life! They travelled extensively ,went to parties and relied on her to hold down the fort at age 17-18.
To say she is a strong minded woman is an understatement, as a matter of fact I feel all the Anderson women are strong minded in their own unique way.
Lainey and I are very different but we shared our love of family, animals , reading great books, skiing, playing tennis ,traveling to foreign places, going to the theater, enjoying our friends & family but most of all …love of chocolate!
When I became a Mama , Lainey was so excited and enamored by my children, she made a terrific Aunt. She shared many Christmases & Thanksgiving with our family which included the outlaws who she grew to know and love.
Our true bonding happened when She came for a visit to Mum & Dad and realized she needed to stay and help out after Mums surgery , so she moved in with them. When the three of them moved to Windrows, Lainey concentrated on Mummy and I on Daddy. We were a tag team ,we supported our parents and one another. Those were trying times but we always kept our sense of humor. When it was time to move Dad to a memory Unit , I cared for him during the day ,and Lainey took care of Mum. She brought her to visit as much as possible and kept her active with her social life. Lainey & I were bedside for Mineys transition and Dad slipped away moments prior to my arrival. I know he did that intentionally . For the past 8 yrs I have been visiting Lainey in Lincoln. We would gather with all our mutual friends to eat and drink and laugh. Over the years our group shrunk but I continued 2-3 times a year to be with her. Afterall , I was her Pearson. I felt that after Miney and Chiz died I got custody of Lainey! 💖
I promised Lainey I would be with her when she was ready to transition home to Spirit ( God)
I am so grateful that I was able to follow my guidence and keep my promise.
Whilst Steve & I lived in London 2013-2016 Lainey visited us four times. She was so thrilled to share her favorite city with us. We had so many wonderful moments together and she got to meet some of the wonderful friends I made in London.
She was fascinated & perplexed by my Spiritual beliefs but always interested. As she often pointed out not everyone believes in this stuff , but when Pepe showed himself to her after passing, I was the only one she could share that with!
Lainey is a wonderful sister and a great Mama to all her animals, after all they were her children. I use present tense because I know her soul is infinite, she is simply no longer here physically on Earth. She is reunited with all her loved ones in the Spirit World, especially Our parents , Pam& Shari and so many more.
I look forward to hearing from her when she is ready.
Sending so much Love,
Christine

Lainey was my Aunt Mari s friend in Boston . Mari "volunteered "Lainey to put up my husband Tom and I on our first trip together to Boston in 1994 and from then Lainey became our friend
Lainey made many subsequent trips to Ireland usually in Autumn for just 4 days [the perfect guest ]Lainey ,my friend Dympna and I would set off to explore all corners of Ireland I think Lainey saw more of Ireland than most people living here She stuck to her "no steps "rule only exciting the car in search of the perfect hot chocolate
She would entertain us with tales of her trips to Georgian Bay [sitting on the dock in an Adirondack chair reading ]Florida [key lime pie and margaritas] her family and their holidays together {she loved them all ] and of course Pepe and Oreo [Lainey was definitely the first "dog in a bag "fashionista ]
In more recent years on our family holidays to New England we would meet up with Lainey in Lincoln /Concorde for lunch dinner or icecream and a catch up

Lainey was a unique lovely lady and we are so sorry she is gone but so happy she was a part of our lives

Ar dheis De go raibh a anam

Deirdre O Doherty Ashbourne Ireland

I have so many thoughts and visions of the good times with Lainey ……
Since I was closest in age to Lainey …I was in her carpool to school and with her own car she took me with her when we had friends to meet ….. at the Dairy Queen or at our community pool …
My bedroom was down the hall from Lainey & Maggie who were opposite each other …so I never considered sneaking into her closet as Meg did and it never made sense in size & it annoyed Lainey but she never blew at Maggie ?
I have only love & respect for Lainey as she chose a life in the alps at a mountain top village in charming Leysin , Switzerland after her 2 years at Katie Gibbs which wasn’t keeping her interested … Lainey loved her British friends at the Vagabond & quickly found a family of interesting mountain climbers ….Her life experiences became so exciting ….
Thus ….Lainey lovingly invited and greeted us 4 childhood & college friends of mine
from Framingham Center as we traveled across the Atlantic Ocean from NY harbor to Rotterdam , Holland on a busy fun student ship …..,
We had 5 wks to explore Europe at age 19 …….. meeting up with Lainey at that incredibly high altitude was so exciting !!! Clouds outside our windows showed us fabulous vistas all over the alps & mountain living watching kids hiking to get to school ….We loved our visit & it was especially difficult getting accustomed to the altitude !!
We 4 stayed at the Vagabond Inn as her guest for a week of hiking and enjoying her interesting UK world renowned mountain climbers ……
Thank you Lainey ❤️

Lainey and I were 9 years apart in age so growing up we were probably “a bridge too far” in terms of having a close personal relationship. We did however have some fun sneaking off to the DQ a few times as others have also mentioned.

Following her graduation from Catherine Gibbs Family life did not suit her so she took off for Switzerland and worked as a ski bum and chamber Maid at a racy place called the “vagabond”. She spent about 3 years there and did not come home .She was a rebel and for that timeframe in the 1960’s that action was quite unheard of .She returned eventually and made an uneasy truce with her father and began her life as a travel agent for American Express .She did well , was the top producer year after year

But steadfastly escued any promotions. She brought a vibrant, diverse and very personable array friends into our family circle

And so many of them due to her vagabond experience were from around the world .We all got to know gorgeous Italians, clever Chinese ,shrewd dry Brits, loud Australians and many more as they joined in on various family holiday get togethers.

In our midlives My life was very busy raising a family and running fairly large companies so Lainey and I continued on the path of casual banter during family get togethers .When our parents passed I started to pay more attention to her as I felt being single her parents filled more of her life than the rest of us so I sensed she may have had a void and could use a call every once in a while from someone who cared about her . We talked about books and movies and she always could give me a run down on everyone else in the family as she did a much better job than I on staying in touch. For a stretch of maybe 15 years Lainey battled severe arthritis and over that course had to replace 2 knees, 2 hips and 2 shoulders as well as multiple fusions of wrists .It seemed like every time we spoke a new joint was going in. She just never complained.

I was always in admiration of her strong independence of mind and spirit .No one needed to guess what she liked and disliked or where she stood on issues. But I didn’t really know her until she got very sick. Having heard of her sudden and many trips to the hospital I called her ostensibly to see if there was anything I could do for her and she imediately told me I was to be the executor of her will and needed to take over her finances/affairs immediately .Only 9 months earlier I had tried to get Lainey interested in selling her condo and moving into an assisted living home and was told very directly to “bug off and mind my own business!” My reply to her proposed role for me was “this is news to me !” but after a few seconds of thought quickly accepted and dug into all things related Lainey .We ended up having to have many many conversations , so many of them quite difficult.

And she leaned into all of them without so much as a whimper. No feeling sorry for oneself or being pissed off about her circumstances. She was such a trooper. She also was quite sweet and caring , so in love with her family her friends her animals her “life “ outside of the hospital. Lainey I will miss you .I wish I had known the real you sooner in life. You were quite special and I feel like I missed out on having such a strong loyal funny friend that you were to so many others.

Good Bye my love,

Duncan

I am heartbroken that Lainey is truly gone, but in the end her quality of life was such that she probably found her passing a welcome release. I will always remember her wit and humor! We also loved books and shared titles we were reading. She was also our go-to person when we needed new movies or shows to watch. Lainey and I became close friends during Covid, because she needed to get out of her condo, and I needed to get out of the house!! At first, we would have lunch at my house every week, but when restaurants reopened, Lainey and I began lunching at Seasons 52 every Wednesday taking turns to treat each other. We had such a good time, and I still miss those special lunches together. Gary, Ben, and Alex also loved Lainey. She came to dinners at our house often, and they also enjoyed their time with her.

Lainey's sense of humor was really appreciated by our kids.
Leah and Ben's fathers' are both named Gary. Lainey thought this was too confusing and dubbed them G1 and G2, and that's been continued in the family. Also, Alex's dog Piper is going to a monastery for some training later in Sept. Lainey suggested that we rename her Sister Piper, and everyone got a kick out of that. Lainey was with us for many dinners over the years, and we will miss her presence at our table. Below are Ben and Leahs notes to me.
Kathy, I am so sorry to hear about Lainey's passing. She was one of a kind; sharp and funny and had excellent taste in books and movies. I'll always remember her dubbing my dad G2 :) And you took such wonderful care of her and were a truly phenomenal friend. I know she will be incredibly missed, but hopefully her memory will be a blessing (a Jewish saying I find meaningful). Let us know if there will be any kind of service, we'd like to be there. Sending you lots of virtual hugs for the moment, and more in person soon ♥️ Leah
--
Leah Bakst, PhD (she/her)
Research Scientist | Boston University
Leah.Bakst@gmail.com

Ben Johnson
2:44 PM (1 hour ago)

to me

Hi mom, I'm so sorry to hear about Lainey. She was so sharp and so fun to be with. Her opinions and recommendations about TV and movies were also so spot on. I'll miss seeing her. I'm glad and grateful she had you for company and support these past few months. Let us know if there's going to be a memorial or anything.We'd love to be there. We are all going to miss her.

Hi Christine, it is Ian here and we were all sorry to hear of Lainey’s demise. So happy that we saw her last Sunday and all the extended Williams family have replied to my message regarding Lainey with fond memories and sadness.
She was such a vibrant and amusing personality over the decades that we have known her and her annual fall visit to the UK will be missed.
Please pass on our condolences to your siblings and our memories of Lainey will be fond and lasting.
Love to you all,
Ian

The Anderson’s always brought more volume than the Ryan’s – an early impression. Lainey – tad more restrained than some of her siblings – I could always count on for a solid, warm and often wry greeting. Somehow she picked up on the “DennyBear” nickname and we shared being the oldest in our families. She always followed up quickly with a memory or question she drew from an earlier exchange. They call this continuity in the theater/film world - it's a professional skill/position; Lainey excelled in this skill and quality.

HF Bar Ranch – a family gathering where the Ryan’s ( Aran, Elliott and I) got to meet some Andersons for the first time – has memories of Lainey and the several horseback rides we all enjoyed together. Who knew all the horses names Day One and from then on? Lainey, of course. She would weave them into our subsequent conversations – making me aware that I better pay more attention to my animal’s character. Or invent it.

Lainey provided me with her – let’s call it “ICFC life details” – when Meg and I visited early on, several times. Who is who, from where and when, what happens next and what happened last year..? She enjoyed reading fiction, and knew tons about films and theater…but ICFC life was rather nonfiction ( well, some embellishments sure!), genealogical and social to its core. I occupied some time with a few crude watercolors of the camp life around me; Lainey was doing her own version of “watercolors” every day too – talking, laughing, recalling, knowing the place and its social vibes.

Lopez Island, early on with our move from the city to rural life – 2009 summer, I believe, son Aran and Zachary (4 yr old) were coming to see what we were getting ourselves into. Lainey was invited to come after ICFC – she too was curious and thoroughly enjoyed the seaplane ride from Seattle up to the island and back. Zach was busy digging for Meg’s garden installation while Lainey was busy reading, sitting on some old wood lawn chair nearby. Lainey kept the happy hour conversation lively, extending into dinner – I recall Zach holding up his end of this exchange quite well!

Lainey moved “temporarily” from the Boston area to Windrows in Princeton to assist her parents through various health moments, aided by nearby Christine and her family. Impressive commitment on the part of both the older and younger sisters. And an example of how “temporary” is indeed a temporary definition too.

The last reunion of Anderson’s families in New Mexico was delightfully relaxing and as always, brief. As I recall, Lainey left with an early-departing group but her flight was delayed or something. Casey discovered this and somehow encouraged/escorted Lainey to return and join those of us ( Ryans, MacDonalds, Casey) who were touring the “zoo”, followed by a splendidly ad hoc happy hour and dinner on a patio.

Meg and I visited Lainey after our visit to Nantucket (with Duncan and Janet, Casey, Mike and Tess and kids – Ramsey and Nell.) We met Lainey and Pam and Vlad at a Cambridge restaurant for a comfortably-extended meal. Lainey’s wonderful conversational skills and her penchant for knitting our present moments to streams of past moments made this all quite special – even though with Lainey it was all just normal. Photos were taken – maybe by Pam? – but alas, not in my files. As we were departing, Pam said quietly, “We may not all see each other again.” This is always true and why Lainey’s social history knitting skills were so treasured and so important.

Good bye, dear Lainey, Sniff, sniff…Dennis ( DBear)

We met Lainey for the first time when she came to the UK in 1967 and always on our trips to visit my sister Pamela in Lincoln. After she retired she came to stay with us nearly every October and only the other day we were wondering if she would make it this year only to learn that she had opted out seriously. We got the sad news from Vladimir. She has left a hole which no one can fill. We will miss her annual presence. She was a good person to have on your team to answer General Knowledge quiz questions on books, films and Royalty. RIP Lainey.

Just because Lainey was my formidable big sister, whose bedroom was adjacent to mine, I was nevertheless undaunted by sneaking into her room and borrowing clothes to wear and strut about in to our ‘clothes conscious’ school I attended. My wardrobe clearly lacked the panache of hers. And despite the size difference between us and that I had to lurk around hoping not to encounter her, I enjoyed to new wardrobe and challenge of escaping her wrath - and trying to keep the clothes from falling off my undeveloped body.

Another ‘stealthy’ relationship we had was that I paid her to help me write reviews for the books I was supposed to read on our summer reading list, which of course she had read and I hadn’t, being too busy fooling around.
Years later Lainey and I would have enjoyable, diametric discussions about books we just read or were on our book list. We rarely read the same book as she read fiction and I non fiction. I recall trying to convince her that I loved and highly recommend she read The History of Sand or The Lost Pianos of Russia. She would politely laugh and say “No thank you”.

So many more fond memories of dear Lainey, but this last one was her love and devotion to supporting the Dairy Queen - aka the DQ - which was in close proximity to the swim club we belonged to. Into her car we all piled and raced off as if our lives depended on consuming one last ice cream assemblage. Lainey’s favorite was a Frappe, a big, threatening concoction of chocolate, milk and an unquantifiable amount of sugar.

Bless her.

Through being Pamela’s best friend Lainey became a great friend to the whole Williams family in the UK. She always showed such a genuine interest in others and was great company. She loved the UK and spent her trips here driving fearlessly around the country visiting her many friends. RIP Lainey - you will be greatly missed x

More than an Aunt, Lainey was my friend. You could never beat her on a good book, movie, or TV show recommendation (particularly if it was British)- she’d already read/watched it and had an opinion. She traveled everywhere as a travel agent and always had stories, tips about (and friends) for anywhere I’d mention. She had an amazing wit and directness to her - if she thought something, she would tell you (My god, you look like sh*t! why!). She was so proud of the friends she’d kept in touch with across decades (and locales), and wanted me to understand the power of holding onto those kinds of friendships. I never met any of her friends, but could feel the love she had for the Williams family, her Vagabond friends, and so many more, including the friends of many of her old friends. I never considered her girly, but she almost always had magenta popping out in either her lipstick or clothes - she loved being bright and colorful.