Mahal keetah , Tatay ("I love you, Father," in Tagalog language); please, go find Nina and be at peace.
Obituary
Cesar B. Baynosa, born June 18, 1937, in Santa Rosa, Laguna, Philippines, passed away on August 22, 2024. From his beginnings as an altar boy to earning a degree in Chemical Engineering from Feati University, Cesar was a trailblazer and role model for his family, being the first to attend college, setting a powerful example for his siblings: Pete, Hurley, Rudy, Nene, Mely, and Sonia; whom he lovingly raised with the guidance and support from Lola Intang (their great Aunt). His early years included service in the Philippine Navy and a dedicated education, which laid the groundwork for a life marked by perseverance and commitment.
In 1969, Cesar migrated to the US, where he built a new life and married Gloria Ronquillo in 1970. They shared many years of love and partnership, raising two daughters: Nina Marie (1971–2019) and Maria Lourdes (born 1974). Cesar worked tirelessly to provide the best for his family, ensuring his daughters received excellent education, including Catholic schools and Rutgers University. His dedication to his family was evident in his efforts to provide the best for his daughters, ensuring they had a bright future.
Known for his casual style and love of bowling, Marlboro Lights, Coke Light, and San Miguel Light beer—earning him the affectionate nickname "Tito Light"—Cesar also delighted in cooking his famous St. Patrick's Day corned beef, always served with rice! Though he preferred the comforts of home, his heart was always divided between his native Philippines and his life in the US. After retiring, he cherished time spent between New Jersey and the Philippines (where he could spend time with his siblings and their families).
Cesar and Gloria had recently moved to Cary, North Carolina in July 2024 to be closer to Maria and her family. He was enjoying his new community, making new friends and attending mass on Sundays. His passing was sudden and unexpected. Cesar's warmth, dedication, and unique charm will be dearly missed by his family and friends. He is survived by his devoted wife Gloria, daughter Maria Lourdes, and the fond memories of his late daughter Nina Marie; he also enjoyed and delighted in his only granddaughter, Henley Anatro (9 years old) and his loyal son-in-law, Steve Anatro. Cesar was 87 years old and passed away peacefully with his wife and daughter present.
North Carolina and his final days
My parents left NJ on July 5th to start their final chapter in North Carolina, with Steve, Henley and me. Everything was going really well. They went through so much change, with the house being cleaned out, sold, and moving down. They put their trust in us.
The new community they live in is safe, with full staff, and great amenities. It's like living on a resort. There are enrichment programs, church services, movies, salon services, and physical therapy all onsite. This community is 10 minutes from my home and it is awesome.
The day before my Dad died, he had a new appointment to see a new cardiologist locally. I took the afternoon off to take him. He was smiling, joking in the car; waved hello to a neighbor as we passed by. He was laughing that my Mom knows everyone in the community and has so many friends, because she talks so much! We laughed and shared a moment.
At the doctor, he was joking about the echo cardio gram being cold. He told the doctor that he liked North Carolina so far, and he joked that we was an old man.
I took him back home and he said he really liked the new doctor a lot. I was very pleased and felt good and lucky to be able to take him. Before I left, he stopped and asked me, “Mer, can you please buy me a rice cooker. I want to make sinigang this weekend.” I was thrilled, because it felt like he was settling into his new home here. I said enthusiastically “YES! We will go to HMart and get the ingredients together.” He smiled big. I was so excited by this request, as he never asks for anything. I gave him a big hug, and held on longer than I normally would. It was special. I left that day feeling really good that all the hard work was behind us, my parents were settling in well, and all the decisions were the right ones.
The next day, Aug 21, at 2pm, I got a call at my office from the physical therapists. I thought they had a billing question. But, no, they said they found him at home in bed, unresponsive, thinking he had a seizure or stroke; they called 911 Emergency immediately, let me know that they were with my Mom and I told them I would be there right away. You see, my Mom was at the main house, doing a physical therapy session; they asked her, “where’s Cesar, he has occupational therapy today?” They told my Mom to continue with her session, took her key and sent one of the staff to go get him.
The therapist found him in bed; he never regained consciousness. They brought my Mom back to the main house, and I picked her up. Then she and I headed to the hospital.
We waited for what seemed like a long time. We finally were brought back to see him. He looked like he was sleeping. They said they found a large mass on his brain, but recommended to send to another hospital where there is neurosurgeons who could better access what our options were.
They transferred him, we drove to the second hospital. We waited.
The neurosurgeon called me. Explained the situation. We would have to make some decisions. He did not realize we were in the hospital, so I asked him if he could meet us in person to discuss. We met in a Family Room in the ER. He showed us the scan. The subdural hematoma was about an inch, which is quite large. The whole left side of the brain had slowly filled up with blood.
He could operate, but it was a risk, and there was no guarantee he would wake up, if he did it would be significant rehabilitation, provided he was coherent. He said there was no response at the moment, eyes unresponsive, indicating little brain activity.
Mom made the hard decision to just keep him comfortable and we would stay with him, and take it from there. She was brave and did not want him to suffer or go through tough situations, given his age. We had Steve on speaker phone (as he had to stay with Henley); we agreed as a family on her decision. We did not want Steve/Henley to come to the hospital, it would be too much, for Henley.
Mom and I sat with him for those 5-6 hours. They took out the breathing tubes, and administered drugs to keep him comfortable. We kissed him and touched his face and whispered to him our thoughts and prayers. I told him, “Mahal keetah, Tatay, please, go find Nina.”
Around 11:30pm, they transferred him from ER to a hospital room. The attendants lifted him to the new bed, and they called us in immediately. “He is going, you should be with him.” They left, and Mom and I were with him, as he breathed his final breath. The room was quiet, and shortly after, a chaplain joined us, she prayed over him, all 3 of us holding hands in a circle around him. She stayed with us for a long time, learning more about my Dad, as we talked and remembered, and grieved. We stayed for a little bit longer. My Mom said, “I do not like August.” And I agreed. This was not a day we could have imagined...
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